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| Line 3: |
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| | <span style="font-weight: bold;">対訳 / 对照:</span> [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-en/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-EN</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-de/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-DE</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-fr/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-FR</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-es/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-ES</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-it/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-IT</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-ru/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-RU</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-ar/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-AR</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-hi/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-HI</span>]] · <span style="color: #FFD700; font-weight: bold;">ZH-JA</span> · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works|<span style="color: #FFD700;">← 目次 / 目录</span>]] | | <span style="font-weight: bold;">対訳 / 对照:</span> [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-en/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-EN</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-de/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-DE</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-fr/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-FR</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-es/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-ES</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-it/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-IT</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-ru/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-RU</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-ar/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-AR</span>]] · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works/zh-hi/Yecao|<span style="color: #FFD700;">ZH-HI</span>]] · <span style="color: #FFD700; font-weight: bold;">ZH-JA</span> · [[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works|<span style="color: #FFD700;">← 目次 / 目录</span>]] |
| | </div> | | </div> |
| | + | |
| | + | = 野草 = |
| | + | = 野草 = |
| | | | |
| | {| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%; table-layout: fixed;" | | {| class="wikitable" style="width: 100%; table-layout: fixed;" |
| − | ! style="width: 50%; background-color: #cc0000; color: white;" | 中文 (原文) | + | ! style="width: 50%; background-color: #cc0000; color: white;" | 中文(原文) |
| − | ! style="width: 50%; background-color: #003399; color: white;" | 日本語 (翻訳) | + | ! style="width: 50%; background-color: #003399; color: white;" | 日本語(翻訳) |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | = 野草 =
| |
| − | | = 野草 (野草) =
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | ''[[Lu_Xun_Complete_Works|鲁迅全集]]翻訳プロジェクトの一部。''
| |
| − | | '''魯迅 (ルーシュン, 1881–1936)'''
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | == 中文原文 ==
| |
| − | | 中国語から日本語への翻訳。
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第1節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 1 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 题辞
| |
| − | | |
| − | 当我沉默着的时候,我觉得充实;我将开口,同时感到空虚。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 过去的生命已经死亡。我对于这死亡有大欢喜,因为我借此知道它曾经存活。死亡的生命已经朽腐。我对于这朽腐有大欢喜,因为我借此知道它还非空虚。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 生命的泥委弃在地面上,不生乔木,只生野草,这是我的罪过。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 野草,根本不深,花叶不美,然而吸取露,吸取水,吸取陈死人的血和肉,各各夺取它的生存。当生存时,还是将遭践踏,将遭删刈,直至于死亡而朽腐。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但我坦然,欣然。我将大笑,我将歌唱。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我自爱我的野草,但我憎恶这以野草作装饰的地面。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 地火在地下运行,奔突;熔岩一旦喷出,将烧尽一切野草,以及乔木,于是并且无可朽腐。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但我坦然,欣然。我将大笑,我将歌唱。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 天地有如此静穆,我不能大笑而且歌唱。天地即不如此静穆,我或者也将不能。我以这一丛野草,在明与暗,生与死,过去与未来之际,献于友与仇,人与兽,爱者与不爱者之前作证。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 为我自己,为友与仇,人与兽,爱者与不爱者,我希望这野草的死亡与朽腐,火速到来。要不然,我先就未曾生存,这实在比死亡与朽腐更其不幸。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 去罢,野草,连着我的题辞!
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二七年四月二十六日,鲁迅记于广州之白云楼上。
| |
| − | | Epigraph
| |
| − | | |
| − | When I am silent, I feel fulfilled; the moment I open my mouth, I feel emptiness.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The life of the past has died. Over this death I feel great joy, for through it I know that it once lived. The dead life has decayed. Over this decay I feel great joy, for through it I know that it was not emptiness.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The mud of life lies cast away upon the ground; it grows no tall trees, only wild grass — this is my fault.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Wild grass: its roots are not deep, its flowers and leaves are not beautiful, yet it absorbs dew, absorbs water, absorbs the blood and flesh of the long dead, each blade seizing its own existence. Yet even while existing, it will be trampled, it will be cut down, until it dies and decays.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But I am calm and glad. I shall laugh aloud; I shall sing.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I love my wild grass, but I loathe the ground that adorns itself with wild grass.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The subterranean fire courses beneath the earth, surging; once the lava erupts, it will burn away all wild grass and tall trees alike, and then there will be nothing left to decay.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But I am calm and glad. I shall laugh aloud; I shall sing.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Heaven and earth are so solemnly still that I cannot laugh aloud or sing. Even if heaven and earth were not so solemnly still, perhaps I still could not. With this clump of wild grass, at the threshold between light and dark, life and death, past and future, I bear witness before friends and foes, humans and beasts, lovers and non-lovers.
| |
| − | | |
| − | For myself, for friends and foes, humans and beasts, lovers and non-lovers, I hope that the death and decay of this wild grass will come swiftly. Otherwise, I shall never have lived, and that would be more unfortunate still than death and decay.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Go then, wild grass, together with my epigraph!
| |
| − | | |
| − | April 26, 1927, recorded by Lu Xun at the Baiyun House in Guangzhou.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第2節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 2 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 秋夜
| |
| − | | |
| − | 在我的后园,可以看见墙外有两株树,一株是枣树,还有一株也是枣树。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 这上面的夜的天空,奇怪而高,我生平没有见过这样的奇怪而高的天空。他仿佛要离开人间而去,使人们仰面不再看见。然而现在却非常之蓝,闪闪地着几十个星星的眼,冷眼。他的口角上现出微笑,似乎自以为大有深意,而将繁霜洒在我的园里的野花草上。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我不知道那些花草真叫什么名字,人们叫他们什么名字。我记得有一种开过极细小的粉红花,现在还开着,但是更极细小了,她在冷的夜气中,瑟缩地做梦,梦见春的到来,梦见秋的到来,梦见瘦的诗人将眼泪擦在她最末的花瓣上,告诉她秋虽然来,冬虽然来,而此后接着还是春,胡蝶乱飞,蜜蜂都唱起春词来了。她于是一笑,虽然颜色冻得红惨惨地,仍然瑟缩着。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 枣树,他们简直落尽了叶子。先前,还有一两个孩子来打他们别人打剩的枣子,现在是一个也不剩了,连叶子也落尽了,他知道小粉红花的梦,秋后要有春;他也知道落叶的梦,春后还是秋。他简直落尽叶子,单剩干子,然而脱了当初满树是果实和叶子时候的弧形,欠伸得很舒服。但是,有几枝还低亚着,护定他从打枣的竿梢所得的皮伤,而最直最长的几枝,却已默默地铁似的直刺着奇怪而高的天空,使天空闪闪地鬼眼;直刺着天空中圆满的月亮,使月亮窘得发白。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 鬼眼的天空越加非常之蓝,不安了,仿佛想离去人间,避开枣树,只将月亮剩下。然而月亮也暗暗地躲到东边去了。而一无所有的干子,却仍然默默地铁似的直刺着奇怪而高的天空,一意要制他的死命,不管他各式各样地着许多蛊惑的眼睛。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 哇的一声,夜游的恶鸟飞过了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我忽而听到夜半的笑声,吃吃地,似乎不愿意惊动睡着的人,然而四围的空气都应和着笑。夜半,没有别的人,我即刻听出这声音就在我嘴里,我也即刻被这笑声所驱逐,回进自己的房。灯火的带子也即刻被我旋高了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 后窗的玻璃上丁丁地响,还有许多小飞虫乱撞。不多久,几个进来了,许是从窗纸的破孔进来的。他们一进来,又在玻璃的灯罩上撞得丁丁地响。一个从上面撞进去了,他于是遇到火,而且我以为这火是真的。两三个却休息在灯的纸罩上喘气。那罩是昨晚新换的罩,雪白的纸,折出波浪纹的叠痕,一角还画出一枝猩红色的栀子。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 猩红的栀子开花时,枣树又要做小粉红花的梦,青葱地弯成弧形了……。我又听到夜半的笑声;我赶紧砍断我的心绪,看那老在白纸罩上的小青虫,头大尾小,向日葵子似的,只有半粒小麦那么大,遍身的颜色苍翠得可爱,可怜。我打一个呵欠,点起一支纸烟,喷出烟来,对着灯默默地敬奠这些苍翠精致的英雄们。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年九月十五日。
| |
| − | | Autumn Night
| |
| − | | |
| − | In my back garden, beyond the wall, I can see two trees — one is a jujube tree, and the other is also a jujube tree.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The night sky above them, strange and high — never in my life have I seen such a strange and high sky. It seems about to leave the human world behind, so that people looking up can see it no more. Yet now it is extraordinarily blue, glittering with the eyes of dozens of stars — cold eyes. At the corners of its mouth appears a smile, as though it considers this profoundly meaningful, and it scatters thick frost over the wildflowers and grasses in my garden.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I do not know the true names of those flowers and grasses, nor what people call them. I remember one kind that once bore tiny pink blossoms; it is blooming still, but tinier than ever. In the cold night air it dreams, shivering — dreams of the coming of spring, dreams of the coming of autumn, dreams that a gaunt poet wipes his tears on its last petal and tells it that although autumn comes and winter comes, spring will follow after, with butterflies fluttering wildly and bees singing their spring songs. At this it smiles, though its color is frozen a pitiful red, and goes on shivering.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The jujube trees — they have shed practically all their leaves. Before, one or two children still came to knock down the jujubes others had left behind; now not a single one remains, even the leaves have all fallen. It knows the dream of the little pink flower: after autumn must come spring; it also knows the dream of the fallen leaves: after spring comes autumn again. It has shed practically all its leaves, only bare branches remain, yet freed from the arching form it bore when the whole tree was full of fruit and leaves, it stretches luxuriously. A few branches, though, still hang low, guarding the bark wounds inflicted by the poles of the fruit pickers, while the straightest and longest branches already thrust silently, iron-like, into the strange and high sky, making it flicker its spectral eyes; thrust straight at the full moon in the sky, until the moon blanches with embarrassment.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The spectral-eyed sky becomes even more extraordinarily blue, grows uneasy, as though wanting to leave the human world, to escape the jujube trees, leaving only the moon behind. Yet the moon too steals away eastward in secret. And the bare branches, possessing nothing, still thrust silently, iron-like, into the strange and high sky, determined to put it to death, regardless of the many bewitching eyes it deploys.
| |
| − | | |
| − | With a screech, a nocturnal bird of prey flies past.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Suddenly I hear laughter at midnight, a titter, as though not wanting to disturb those asleep, yet the air all around echoes the laughter. At midnight, no one else is present; I recognize at once that the sound comes from my own mouth, and at once the laughter drives me back into my room. I turn the lamp wick higher immediately.
| |
| − | | |
| − | On the rear windowpane comes a tapping — many small flying insects crash against it. Before long, several come in, probably through a hole in the window paper. Once inside, they crash tapping against the glass lampshade. One plunges in from above and meets the flame — and I believe this flame is real. Two or three others rest on the paper shade of the lamp, panting. The shade was changed just last night: snow-white paper, folded into wave-like creases, with a scarlet gardenia branch painted in one corner.
| |
| − | | |
| − | When the scarlet gardenia blooms, the jujube tree will again dream the little pink flower's dream, bending into a lush green arc... I hear the midnight laughter again; hastily I cut short my reverie and gaze at the little green insects resting on the white paper shade, large-headed and slender-tailed, like sunflower seeds, only half the size of a grain of wheat, their whole bodies a lovely, pitiable jade green. I yawn, light a cigarette, blow out the smoke, and silently, by lamplight, offer a libation to these exquisite jade-green heroes.
| |
| − | | |
| − | September 15, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第3節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 3 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 影的告别
| |
| − | | |
| − | 人睡到不知道时候的时候,就会有影来告别,说出那些话——
| |
| − | | |
| − | 有我所不乐意的在天堂里,我不愿去;有我所不乐意的在地狱里,我不愿去;有我所不乐意的在你们将来的黄金世界里,我不愿去。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而你就是我所不乐意的。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 朋友,我不想跟随你了,我不愿住。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我不愿意!
| |
| − | | |
| − | 呜乎呜乎,我不愿意,我不如彷徨于无地。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我不过一个影,要别你而沉没在黑暗里了。然而黑暗又会吞并我,然而光明又会使我消失。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而我不愿彷徨于明暗之间,我不如在黑暗里沉没。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而我终于彷徨于明暗之间,我不知道是黄昏还是黎明。我姑且举灰黑的手装作喝干一杯酒,我将在不知道时候的时候独自远行。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 呜乎呜乎,倘若黄昏,黑夜自然会来沉没我,否则我要被白天消失,如果现是黎明。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 朋友,时候近了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我将向黑暗里彷徨于无地。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 你还想我的赠品。我能献你甚么呢?无已,则仍是黑暗和虚空而已。但是,我愿意只是黑暗,或者会消失于你的白天;我愿意只是虚空,决不占你的心地。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我愿意这样,朋友——我独自远行,不但没有你,并且再没有别的影在黑暗里。只有我被黑暗沉没,那世界全属于我自己。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年九月二十四日。
| |
| − | | Farewell of the Shadow
| |
| − | | |
| − | When a person sleeps into an hour unknown, then the shadow comes to say farewell, and speaks those words —
| |
| − | | |
| − | There is that which displeases me in heaven; I will not go. There is that which displeases me in hell; I will not go. There is that which displeases me in your future golden world; I will not go.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yet you yourself are what displeases me.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Friend, I no longer wish to follow you; I do not wish to stay.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I do not wish to!
| |
| − | | |
| − | Alas, alas, I do not wish to — I would rather wander in a place that is no place.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I am nothing but a shadow, about to leave you and sink into darkness. Yet darkness will swallow me, and light will make me vanish.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yet I do not wish to wander between light and dark; I would rather sink into darkness.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yet in the end I do wander between light and dark, not knowing whether it is dusk or dawn. For now I raise my grey-black hand and pretend to drain a glass of wine; I shall set out alone into the distance at an hour unknown.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Alas, alas — if it is dusk, the night will naturally come and engulf me; otherwise I shall be erased by daylight, if this is the dawn.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Friend, the hour draws near.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I shall wander into the darkness, into a place that is no place.
| |
| − | | |
| − | You still wish for a parting gift from me. What can I offer you? If there must be something, it is still nothing but darkness and emptiness. But I am willing to be only darkness, which may vanish in your daylight; I am willing to be only emptiness, which will never claim space in your heart.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Let it be so, friend — I set out alone into the distance, not only without you, but without any other shadow in the darkness. Only I shall be engulfed by darkness, and that world will belong entirely to me.
| |
| − | | |
| − | September 24, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第4節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 4 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 求乞者
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我顺着剥落的高墙走路,踏着松的灰土。另外有几个人,各自走路。微风起来,露在墙头的高树的枝条带着还未干枯的叶子在我头上摇动。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 微风起来,四面都是灰土。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一个孩子向我求乞,也穿着夹衣,也不见得悲戚,而拦着磕头,追着哀呼。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我厌恶他的声调,态度。我憎恶他并不悲哀,近于儿戏;我烦厌他这追着哀呼。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我走路。另外有几个人各自走路。微风起来,四面都是灰土。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一个孩子向我求乞,也穿着夹衣,也不见得悲戚,但是哑的,摊开手,装着手势。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我就憎恶他这手势。而且,他或者并不哑,这不过是一种求乞的法子。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我不布施,我无布施心,我但居布施者之上,给与烦腻,疑心,憎恶。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我顺着倒败的泥墙走路,断砖叠在墙缺口,墙里面没有什么。微风起来,送秋寒穿透我的夹衣;四面都是灰土。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我想着我将用什么方法求乞:发声,用怎样声调?装哑,用怎样手势?……
| |
| − | | |
| − | 另外有几个人各自走路。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我将得不到布施,得不到布施心;我将得到自居于布施之上者的烦腻,疑心,憎恶。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我将用无所为和沉默求乞……我至少将得到虚无。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 微风起来,四面都是灰土。另外有几个人各自走路。灰土,灰土,……
| |
| − | | |
| − | …………
| |
| − | | |
| − | 灰土……
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年九月二十四日。
| |
| − | | The Beggar
| |
| − | | |
| − | I walk along the high, crumbling wall, treading on loose ash and dust. A few others walk too, each on their own. A light breeze rises; the branches of the tall trees showing above the wall, their leaves not yet withered, sway above my head.
| |
| − | | |
| − | A light breeze rises; on all sides, nothing but ash and dust.
| |
| − | | |
| − | A child begs from me, also wearing a lined jacket, not looking the least bit sorrowful, blocking my way with kowtows, following me with plaintive cries.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I loathe his tone, his manner. I despise the fact that he is not sad at all, that it is practically a game; I am disgusted by his pursuing me with plaintive cries.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I walk on. A few others walk too, each on their own. A light breeze rises; on all sides, nothing but ash and dust.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Another child begs from me, also wearing a lined jacket, also not looking sorrowful, but mute, hands outstretched, making gestures.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I despise those gestures. And perhaps he is not mute at all; this is merely a method of begging.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I give no alms; I have no charitable heart; I merely place myself above the almsgiver and bestow weariness, suspicion, loathing.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I walk along the collapsed mud wall, broken bricks stacked in the gap, nothing behind the wall. A light breeze rises, sending autumn cold through my lined jacket; on all sides, nothing but ash and dust.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I think about how I shall beg: Shall I speak — in what tone? Pretend to be mute — with what gestures?...
| |
| − | | |
| − | A few others walk on, each on their own.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I shall receive no alms, no charitable heart; I shall receive the weariness, suspicion, and loathing of those who place themselves above the almsgiver.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I shall beg with inaction and silence... At the very least I shall obtain nothingness.
| |
| − | | |
| − | A light breeze rises; on all sides, nothing but ash and dust. A few others walk on, each on their own. Ash and dust, ash and dust...
| |
| − | | |
| − | ......
| |
| − | | |
| − | Ash and dust...
| |
| − | | |
| − | September 24, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第5節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 5 ===
| |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | 我的失恋 | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | + | 墓碣文 |
| − | ——拟古的新打油诗
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我的所爱在山腰;
| |
| − | 想去寻她山太高,
| |
| − | 低头无法泪沾袍。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 爱人赠我百蝶巾;
| |
| − | 回她什么:猫头鹰。
| |
| − | 从此翻脸不理我,
| |
| − | 不知何故兮使我心惊。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我的所爱在闹市;
| |
| − | 想去寻她人拥挤,
| |
| − | 仰头无法泪沾耳。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 爱人赠我双燕图;
| |
| − | 回她什么:冰糖壶卢。
| |
| − | 从此翻脸不理我,
| |
| − | 不知何故兮使我胡涂。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我的所爱在河滨;
| |
| − | 想去寻她河水深,
| |
| − | 歪头无法泪沾襟。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 爱人赠我金表索;
| |
| − | 回她什么:发汗药。
| |
| − | 从此翻脸不理我,
| |
| − | 不知何故兮使我神经衰弱。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我的所爱在豪家;
| |
| − | 想去寻她兮没有汽车,
| |
| − | 摇头无法泪如麻。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 爱人赠我玫瑰花;
| |
| − | 回她什么:赤练蛇。
| |
| − | 从此翻脸不理我,
| |
| − | 不知何故兮——由她去罢。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年十月三日。
| |
| − | | My Lost Love
| |
| − | | |
| − | — A new doggerel in the antique style
| |
| − | | |
| − | My beloved lives on the mountainside;
| |
| − | I want to seek her, but the mountain is too high,
| |
| − | I lower my head — no use — tears stain my robe.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My love gives me a scarf with a hundred butterflies;
| |
| − | what do I give in return: an owl.
| |
| − | From then on she turns her back and ignores me.
| |
| − | Why — oh why — does my heart tremble so.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My beloved lives in the bustling market;
| |
| − | I want to seek her, but the crowd is too thick,
| |
| − | I raise my head — no use — tears stain my ears.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My love gives me a painting of two swallows;
| |
| − | what do I give in return: candied hawthorn on a stick.
| |
| − | From then on she turns her back and ignores me.
| |
| − | Why — oh why — am I utterly confused.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My beloved lives by the riverside;
| |
| − | I want to seek her, but the water is too deep,
| |
| − | I tilt my head — no use — tears stain my collar.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My love gives me a gold watch chain;
| |
| − | what do I give in return: medicine to induce sweating.
| |
| − | From then on she turns her back and ignores me.
| |
| − | Why — oh why — have I got a nervous breakdown.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My beloved lives in a grand mansion;
| |
| − | I want to seek her, alas, I have no automobile,
| |
| − | I shake my head — no use — tears fall like tangled hemp.
| |
| − | | |
| − | My love gives me a rose;
| |
| − | what do I give in return: a scarlet snake.
| |
| − | From then on she turns her back and ignores me.
| |
| − | Why — oh why — let her go, then!
| |
| − | | |
| − | October 3, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第6節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 6 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 复仇
| |
| − | | |
| − | 人的皮肤之厚,大概不到半分,鲜红的热血,就循着那后面,在比密密层层地爬在墙壁上的槐蚕更其密的血管里奔流,散出温热。于是各以这温热互相蛊惑,煽动,牵引,拚命地希求偎倚,接吻,拥抱,以得生命的沉酣的大欢喜。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但倘若用一柄尖锐的利刃,只一击,穿透这桃红色的,菲薄的皮肤,将见那鲜红的热血激箭似的以所有温热直接灌溉杀戮者;其次,则给以冰冷的呼吸,示以淡白的嘴唇,使之人性茫然,得到生命的飞扬的极致的大欢喜;而其自身,则永远沉浸于生命的飞扬的极致的大欢喜中。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 这样,所以,有他们俩裸着全身,捏着利刃,对立于广漠的旷野之上。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 他们俩将要拥抱,将要杀戮……路人们从四面奔来,密密层层地,如槐蚕爬上墙壁,如马蚁要扛鲞头。衣服都漂亮,手倒空的。然而从四面奔来,而且拚命地伸长颈子,要赏鉴这拥抱或杀戮。他们已经豫觉着事后的自己的舌上的汗或血的鲜味。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而他们俩对立着,在广漠的旷野之上,裸着全身,捏着利刃,然而也不拥抱,也不杀戮,而且也不见有拥抱或杀戮之意。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 他们俩这样地至于永久,圆活的身体,已将干枯,然而毫不见有拥抱或杀戮之意。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 路人们于是乎无聊;觉得有无聊钻进他们的毛孔,觉得有无聊从他们自己的心中由毛孔钻出,爬满旷野,又钻进别人的毛孔中。他们于是觉得喉舌干燥,脖子也乏了;终至于面面相觑,慢慢走散;甚而至于居然觉得干枯到失了生趣。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 于是只剩下广漠的旷野,而他们俩在其间裸着全身,捏着利刃,干枯地立着;以死人似的眼光,赏鉴这路人们的干枯,无血的大戮,而永远沉浸于生命的飞扬的极致的大欢喜中。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年十二月二十日。
| |
| − | | Revenge
| |
| − | | |
| − | Human skin is perhaps less than half a line thick; just behind it, bright red hot blood courses through vessels denser than the legions of caterpillars that crawl across walls, radiating warmth. And so, each bewitches, inflames, and draws the other with this warmth, desperately craving to nestle, to kiss, to embrace — to attain the intoxicated great joy of life.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But if one were to thrust a sharp blade just once through this peach-pink, gossamer skin, one would see bright red hot blood gush out like arrows, pouring all its warmth directly upon the slayer; next, one would bestow icy breath, reveal pallid lips, dissolve the slayer's humanity into blankness — and so attain the great joy of life's soaring pinnacle; and the self would remain forever immersed in the great joy of life's soaring pinnacle.
| |
| − | | |
| − | And so, there they stand, the two of them, naked, gripping blades, facing each other upon a vast and desolate steppe.
| |
| − | | |
| − | They are about to embrace, about to kill... Passersby rush in from all sides, packed as densely as caterpillars climbing a wall, as ants trying to carry a fish head. Their clothes are fine, but their hands are empty. Yet they rush in from all sides, craning their necks desperately, eager to feast their eyes on this embrace or slaughter. Already they taste on their own tongues the fresh flavor of sweat or blood.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But the two stand facing each other upon the vast and desolate steppe, naked, gripping blades — yet neither embracing nor killing, nor showing the slightest intention to embrace or kill.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The two remain so until eternity; their full, living bodies have begun to wither, yet they show not the slightest intention to embrace or kill.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The passersby thereupon grow bored; they feel boredom drilling into their pores, feel boredom crawling out from their own hearts through their pores, creeping across the steppe and drilling into the pores of others. They feel their throats and tongues go dry, their necks grow weary; at last they stare at one another and slowly drift away; they even feel so withered that they have lost all zest for life.
| |
| − | | |
| − | And so nothing remains but the vast and desolate steppe, and the two standing within it, naked, gripping blades, withered; with the gaze of the dead they contemplate the withering of the passersby — a bloodless great massacre — and remain forever immersed in the great joy of life's soaring pinnacle.
| |
| − | | |
| − | December 20, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第7節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 7 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 复仇(其二)
| |
| − | | |
| − | 因为他自以为神之子,以色列的王,所以去钉十字架。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 兵丁们给他穿上紫袍,戴上荆冠,庆贺他;又拿一根苇子打他的头,吐他,屈膝拜他;戏弄完了,就给他脱了紫袍,仍穿他自己的衣服。看哪,他们打他的头,吐他,拜他……他不肯喝那用没药调和的酒,要分明地玩味以色列人怎样对付他们的神之子,而且较永久地悲悯他们的前途,然而仇恨他们的现在。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 四面都是敌意,可悲悯的,可咒诅的。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 丁丁地响,钉尖从掌心穿透,他们要钉杀他们的神之子了,可悯的人们呵,使他痛得柔和。丁丁地响,钉尖从脚背穿透,钉碎了一块骨,痛楚也透到心髓中,然而他们自己钉杀着他们的神之子了,可咒诅的人们呵,这使他痛得舒服。十字架竖起来了;他悬在虚空中。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 他没有喝那用没药调和的酒,要分明地玩味以色列人怎样对付他们的神之子,而且较永久地悲悯他们的前途,然而仇恨他们的现在。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 路人都辱骂他,祭司长和文士也戏弄他,和他同钉的两个强盗也讥诮他。看哪,和他同钉的……四面都是敌意,可悲悯的,可咒诅的。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 他在手足的痛楚中,玩味着可悯的人们的钉杀神之子的悲哀和可咒诅的人们要钉杀神之子,而神之子就要被钉杀了的欢喜。突然间,碎骨的大痛楚透到心髓了,他即沉酣于大欢喜和大悲悯中。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 他腹部波动了,悲悯和咒诅的痛楚的波。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 遍地都黑暗了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "以罗伊,以罗伊,拉马撒巴各大尼?!"(翻出来,就是:我的上帝,你为甚么离弃我?!)上帝离弃了他,他终于还是一个"人之子";然而以色列人连"人之子"都钉杀了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 钉杀了"人之子"的人们的身上,比钉杀了"神之子"的尤其血污,血腥。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二四年十二月二十日。
| |
| − | | Revenge (II)
| |
| − | | |
| − | Because he considered himself the Son of God, the King of Israel, he went to be nailed to the cross.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The soldiers dressed him in a purple robe, put a crown of thorns on him, and hailed him; they struck his head with a reed, spat on him, knelt before him; when they had finished mocking him, they took off the purple robe and put his own clothes back on him. Behold, they strike his head, spit on him, worship him... He refused to drink the wine mixed with myrrh; he wanted to taste clearly and distinctly how the Israelites dealt with their Son of God, and to pity their future forever, while hating their present.
| |
| − | | |
| − | On all sides, nothing but hostility — pitiable and accursed.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Clang, clang — the nail point pierces through the palm; they are crucifying their Son of God, pitiable people, and the pain feels gentle to him. Clang, clang — the nail point pierces through the instep, shattering a bone; the agony penetrates to the marrow, yet they themselves are crucifying their Son of God, accursed people, and the pain feels comfortable to him. The cross is raised; he hangs in the void.
| |
| − | | |
| − | He did not drink the wine mixed with myrrh; he wanted to taste clearly and distinctly how the Israelites dealt with their Son of God, and to pity their future forever, while hating their present.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Passersby revile him; the chief priests and scribes mock him; the two robbers crucified with him deride him. Behold, those crucified with him... On all sides, nothing but hostility — pitiable and accursed.
| |
| − | | |
| − | In the agony of his hands and feet, he savors the sorrow of the pitiable people who crucify the Son of God, and the joy of the accursed people who would crucify the Son of God — and the Son of God is about to be crucified. Suddenly the great agony of shattered bone penetrates to the marrow, and he sinks into great joy and great compassion.
| |
| − | | |
| − | His abdomen heaves — a wave of compassion and curse and agony.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The whole earth went dark.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?!" (Which is to say: My God, why have you forsaken me?!) God has forsaken him; in the end he was merely a "Son of Man." Yet the Israelites have crucified even the "Son of Man."
| |
| − | | |
| − | Those who crucified the "Son of Man" are more bloodstained and more blood-reeking than those who would have crucified the "Son of God."
| |
| − | | |
| − | December 20, 1924.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第8節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 8 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 希望
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我的心分外地寂寞。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而我的心很平安:没有爱憎,没有哀乐,也没有颜色和声音。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我大概老了。我的头发已经苍白,不是很明白的事么?我的手颤抖着,不是很明白的事么?那么,我的魂灵的手一定也颤抖着,头发也一定苍白了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而这是许多年前的事了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 这以前,我的心也曾充满过血腥的歌声:血和铁,火焰和毒,恢复和报仇。而忽而这些都空虚了,但有时故意地填以没奈何的自欺的希望。希望,希望,用这希望的盾,抗拒那空虚中的暗夜的袭来,虽然盾后面也依然是空虚中的暗夜。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而就是如此,陆续地耗尽了我的青春。我早先岂不知我的青春已经逝去了?但以为身外的青春固在:星,月光,僵坠的胡蝶,暗中的花,猫头鹰的不祥之言,杜鹃的啼血,笑的渺茫,爱的翔舞……。虽然是悲凉漂渺的青春罢,然而究竟是青春。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而现在何以如此寂寞?难道连身外的青春也都逝去,世上的青年也多衰老了么?
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我只得由我来肉薄这空虚中的暗夜了。我放下了希望之盾,我听到Petőfi Sándor(1823—49)的"希望"之歌:希望是甚么?是娼妓:她对谁都蛊惑,将一切都献给;待你牺牲了极多的宝贝——你的青春——她就弃掉你。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 这伟大的抒情诗人,匈牙利的爱国者,为了祖国而死在可萨克兵的矛尖上,已经七十五年了。悲哉死也,然而更可悲的是他的诗至今没有死。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但是,可惨的人生!桀骜英勇如Petőfi,也终于对了暗夜止步,回顾着茫茫的东方了。他说:绝望之为虚妄,正与希望相同。倘使我还得偷生在不明不暗的这"虚妄"中,我就还要寻求那逝去的悲凉漂渺的青春,但不妨在我的身外。因为身外的青春倘一消灭,我身中的迟暮也即凋零了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而现在没有星和月光,没有僵坠的胡蝶以至笑的渺茫,爱的翔舞。然而青年们很平安。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我只得由我来肉薄这空虚中的暗夜了,纵使寻不到身外的青春,也总得自己来一掷我身中的迟暮。但暗夜又在那里呢?现在没有星,没有月光以至笑的渺茫和爱的翔舞;青年们很平安,而我的面前又竟至于并且没有真的暗夜。绝望之为虚妄,正与希望相同!
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年一月一日。
| |
| − | | Hope
| |
| − | | |
| − | My heart is unusually lonely.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yet my heart is very calm: without love or hate, without sorrow or joy, without color or sound.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I must be old. My hair is already grey — is that not plain enough? My hands tremble — is that not plain enough? Then surely my soul's hands must tremble too, and its hair must have turned grey.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But that was many years ago.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Before that, my heart too was filled with blood-drenched songs: blood and iron, flames and poison, restoration and vengeance. Then suddenly all this became empty, though sometimes I deliberately filled it with helpless, self-deceiving hope. Hope, hope — with this shield of hope I fended off the dark night within the void, though behind the shield still lurked the dark night of the void.
| |
| − | | |
| − | And yet, in just this way, my youth was gradually consumed. Did I not know long ago that my youth had passed? But I believed that youth outside myself still endured: stars, moonlight, stiff-fallen butterflies, flowers in the dark, the ominous cry of the owl, the cuckoo's blood-cry, the dimness of laughter, the soaring dance of love... Though it was a sorrowful and ephemeral youth, it was youth after all.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But why is it so lonely now? Has even the youth outside myself departed — have even the young people of the world grown old?
| |
| − | | |
| − | I must confront this dark night within the void myself. I set down the shield of hope and heard Petőfi Sándor's (1823-49) song "Hope": What is hope? A harlot: she bewitches everyone, gives herself to all; once you have sacrificed your most precious treasure — your youth — she casts you aside.
| |
| − | | |
| − | This great lyric poet, Hungary's patriot, died on the lance-point of a Cossack for his fatherland, seventy-five years ago now. Sorrowful his death, yet more sorrowful still that his poetry has not died to this day.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But what a wretched life! Even one as proud and valiant as Petőfi at last halted before the dark night and gazed back at the vast East. He said: Despair is as vain as hope. If I must go on stealing a life in this "vanity" between light and dark, I shall still seek that vanished, sorrowful, ephemeral youth — if need be outside myself. For once the youth outside me is extinguished, the twilight within me will wither too.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yet now there are no stars and no moonlight, no stiff-fallen butterflies, no dimness of laughter, no soaring dance of love. Yet the young people are quite calm.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I must confront this dark night within the void myself; even if I cannot find youth outside myself, I must at least cast my own twilight into the balance. But where is the dark night? Now there are no stars, no moonlight, no dimness of laughter, no soaring dance of love; the young people are quite calm, and before me there is not even a true dark night. Despair is as vain as hope!
| |
| − | | |
| − | January 1, 1925.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第9節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 9 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 雪
| |
| − | | |
| − | 暖国的雨,向来没有变过冰冷的坚硬的灿烂的雪花。博识的人们觉得他单调,他自己也以为不幸否耶?江南的雪,可是滋润美艳之至了;那是还在隐约着的青春的消息,是极壮健的处子的皮肤。雪野中有血红的宝珠山茶,白中隐青的单瓣梅花,深黄的磬口的蜡梅花;雪下面还有冷绿的杂草。胡蝶确乎没有;蜜蜂是否来采山茶花和梅花的蜜,我可记不真切了。但我的眼前仿佛看见冬花开在雪野中,有许多蜜蜂们忙碌地飞着,也听得他们嗡嗡地闹着。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 孩子们呵着冻得通红,像紫芽姜一般的小手,七八个一齐来塑雪罗汉。因为不成功,谁的父亲也来帮忙了。罗汉就塑得比孩子们高得多,虽然不过是上小下大的一堆,终于分不清是壶卢还是罗汉;然而很洁白,很明艳,以自身的滋润相粘结,整个地闪闪地生光。孩子们用龙眼核给他做眼珠,又从谁的母亲的脂粉奁中偷得胭脂来涂在嘴唇上。这回确是一个大阿罗汉了。他也就目光灼灼地嘴唇通红地坐在雪地里。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 第二天还有几个孩子来访问他;对了他拍手,点头,嘻笑。但他终于独自坐着了。晴天又来消释他的皮肤,寒夜又使他结一层冰,化作不透明的水晶模样;连续的晴天又使他成为不知道算什么,而嘴上的胭脂也褪尽了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但是,朔方的雪花在纷飞之后,却永远如粉,如沙,他们决不粘连,撒在屋上,地上,枯草上,就是这样。屋上的雪是早已就有消化了的,因为屋里居人的火的温热。别的,在晴天之下,旋风忽来,便蓬勃地奋飞,在日光中灿灿地生光,如包藏火焰的大雾,旋转而且升腾,弥漫太空,使太空旋转而且升腾地闪烁。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 在无边的旷野上,在凛冽的天宇下,闪闪地旋转升腾着的是雨的精魂……
| |
| − | | |
| − | 是的,那是孤独的雪,是死掉的雨,是雨的精魂。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年一月十八日。
| |
| − | | Snow
| |
| − | | |
| − | The rain of warm countries has never turned into cold, hard, glittering snowflakes. Learned people find it monotonous — does it consider itself unfortunate? But the snow of the South is of a supremely lush and ravishing beauty; it is the still-hidden tidings of youth, the skin of a maiden in the full bloom of health. In the snowy wilderness stand blood-red pearl camellias, single-petaled plum blossoms white tinged with blue-green, deep yellow bell-shaped wintersweet; beneath the snow, cold green weeds still grow. Butterflies there are certainly none; whether bees came to gather nectar from the camellias and plum blossoms, I cannot clearly remember. But before my eyes I seem to see winter flowers blooming in the snowy wilderness, many bees busily flying about, and I hear them humming at their work.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Children blow on their little hands, frozen red as purple ginger buds, and come seven or eight together to mold a snow luohan. Because they do not succeed, someone's father comes to help. The luohan grows much taller than the children, though it is only a pile narrow at the top and broad at the bottom, and in the end no one can tell whether it is a bottle gourd or a luohan; but it is very pure white, very bright, held together by its own moisture, gleaming as a whole. The children use longan pits for his eyeballs and steal rouge from someone's mother's cosmetic box to paint on his lips. This time it is truly a great arhat. And so he sits in the snow with blazing eyes and bright red lips.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The next day a few children come to visit him; they clap their hands before him, nod, and laugh. But at last he sits alone. Sunny days come and dissolve his skin; cold nights coat him with a layer of ice, turning him into a kind of opaque crystal; more sunny days make him something unnameable, and the rouge on his lips has faded entirely.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But the snowflakes of the North, after swirling wildly, remain forever like powder, like sand; they never cling together, scattered on rooftops, on the ground, on dead grass — that is all. The snow on rooftops has long since melted, because of the warmth from the fires of those who dwell beneath. As for the rest, under clear skies, when a whirlwind suddenly comes, they fly up vigorously, glittering brilliantly in the sunlight, like a great fog harboring flames, swirling and rising, filling the entire sky, making it swirl and rise and glitter.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Upon the boundless steppe, beneath the bitter sky, what swirls and rises, glittering, is the spirit of rain...
| |
| − | | |
| − | Yes, that is lonely snow, dead rain — the spirit of rain.
| |
| − | | |
| − | January 18, 1925.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第10節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 10 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 风筝
| |
| − | | |
| − | 北京的冬季,地上还有积雪,灰黑色的秃树枝丫叉于晴朗的天空中,而远处有一二风筝浮动,在我是一种惊异和悲哀。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 故乡的风筝时节,是春二月,倘听到沙沙的风轮声,仰头便能看见一个淡墨色的蟹风筝或嫩蓝色的蜈蚣风筝。还有寂寞的瓦片风筝,没有风轮,又放得很低,伶仃地显出憔悴可怜模样。但此时地上的杨柳已经发芽,早的山桃也多吐蕾,和孩子们的天上的点缀相照应,打成一片春日的温和。我现在在那里呢?四面都还是严冬的肃杀,而久经诀别的故乡的久经逝去的春天,却就在这天空中荡漾了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但我是向来不爱放风筝的,不但不爱,并且嫌恶他,因为我以为这是没出息孩子所做的玩艺。和我相反的是我的小兄弟,他那时大概十岁内外罢,多病,瘦得不堪,然而最喜欢风筝,自己买不起,我又不许放,他只得张着小嘴,呆看着空中出神,有时至于小半日。远处的蟹风筝突然落下来了,他惊呼;两个瓦片风筝的缠绕解开了,他高兴得跳跃。他的这些,在我看来都是笑柄,可鄙的。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 有一天,我忽然想起,似乎多日不很看见他了,但记得曾见他在后园拾枯竹。我恍然大悟似的,便跑向少有人去的一间堆积杂物的小屋去,推开门,果然就在尘封的什物堆中发见了他。他向着大方凳,坐在小凳上;便很惊惶地站了起来,失了色瑟缩着。大方凳旁靠着一个胡蝶风筝的竹骨,还没有糊上纸,凳上是一对做眼睛用的小风轮,正用红纸条装饰着,将要完工了。我在破获秘密的满足中,又很愤怒他的瞒了我的眼睛,这样苦心孤诣地来偷做没出息孩子的玩艺。我即刻伸手折断了胡蝶的一支翅骨,又将风轮掷在地下,踏扁了。论长幼,论力气,他是都敌不过我的,我当然得到完全的胜利,于是傲然走出,留他绝望地站在小屋里。后来他怎样,我不知道,也没有留心。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 然而我的惩罚终于轮到了,在我们离别得很久之后,我已经是中年。我不幸偶而看了一本外国的讲论儿童的书,才知道游戏是儿童最正当的行为,玩具是儿童的天使。于是二十年来毫不忆及的幼小时候对于精神的虐杀的这一幕,忽地在眼前展开,而我的心也仿佛同时变了铅块,很重很重的堕下去了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但心又不竟堕下去而至于断绝,他只是很重很重地堕着,堕着。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我也知道补过的方法的:送他风筝,赞成他放,劝他放,我和他一同放。我们嚷着,跑着,笑着。——然而他其时已经和我一样,早已有了胡子了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我也知道还有一个补过的方法的:去讨他的宽恕,等他说,"我可是毫不怪你呵。"那么,我的心一定就轻松了,这确是一个可行的方法。有一回,我们会面的时候,是脸上都已添刻了许多"生"的辛苦的条纹,而我的心很沉重。我们渐渐谈起儿时的旧事来,我便叙述到这一节,自说少年时代的胡涂。"我可是毫不怪你呵。"我想,他要说了,我即刻便受了宽恕,我的心从此也宽松了罢。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "有过这样的事么?"他惊异地笑着说,就像旁听着别人的故事一样。他什么也不记得了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 全然忘却,毫无怨恨,又有什么宽恕之可言呢?无怨的恕,说谎罢了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我还能希求什么呢?我的心只得沉重着。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 现在,故乡的春天又在这异地的空中了,既给我久经逝去的儿时的回忆,而一并也带着无可把握的悲哀。我倒不如躲到肃杀的严冬中去罢,——但是,四面又明明是严冬,正给我非常的寒威和冷气。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年一月二十四日。
| |
| − | | The Kite
| |
| − | | |
| − | In Beijing's winter, snow still covers the ground, grey-black bare branches fork against the clear sky, and in the distance one or two kites float — for me, a cause of astonishment and sorrow.
| |
| − | | |
| − | In my hometown, kite season is the second month of spring; if one hears the rustling of wind-wheels and looks up, one can see an ink-colored crab kite or a pale blue centipede kite. There are also solitary tile-kites, without wind-wheels, flying very low, looking forlorn and wretched. But at that time the willows on the ground have already budded, the early mountain peaches have put forth blossoms, and together with the children's adornments in the sky, they form a single scene of spring gentleness. Where am I now? On all sides there is still the killing severity of deep winter, yet the long-departed spring of my long-departed hometown ripples through this very sky.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But I never liked flying kites — not only did I not like it, I loathed it, for I considered it the pastime of good-for-nothing children. The opposite of me was my little brother, about ten years old at the time, often ill, pitifully thin, yet he loved kites more than anything. He could not afford to buy one, and I would not let him fly one, so he could only stand with his mouth open, staring at the sky in a daze, sometimes for half a day. When a crab kite suddenly fell in the distance, he cried out; when two tile-kites untangled themselves, he jumped for joy. All this, in my eyes, was laughable and contemptible.
| |
| − | | |
| − | One day it suddenly occurred to me that I had hardly seen him for days, though I remembered seeing him collecting dry bamboo in the back garden. As if suddenly enlightened, I ran to a seldom-visited little room piled with odds and ends, pushed open the door, and indeed found him amid the dusty clutter. He sat on a small stool before a large bench; startled, he stood up, went pale, and shrank. Leaning against the bench was the bamboo frame of a butterfly kite, not yet covered with paper; on the bench lay a pair of small wind-wheels for the eyes, being decorated with strips of red paper, nearly finished. In the satisfaction of uncovering his secret, I was also furious that he had gone behind my back to painstakingly craft a good-for-nothing's toy. I immediately reached out and snapped one wing-bone of the butterfly, threw the wind-wheels on the ground, and trampled them flat. In age and strength, he was no match for me; naturally I won complete victory, and walked out haughtily, leaving him standing in the little room in despair. What became of him afterward, I did not know, nor did I care.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But my punishment came at last, long after we had parted, when I was already middle-aged. I happened to read a foreign book about children and learned that play is a child's most legitimate activity, and toys are the angels of childhood. Then that scene of spiritual cruelty from childhood, unremembered for twenty years, suddenly unrolled before my eyes, and my heart seemed to turn into a block of lead, sinking very, very heavily.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But the heart did not sink all the way to breaking; it only sank heavily, very heavily, sinking and sinking.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I also knew how to make amends: give him a kite, encourage him to fly it, urge him to fly it, fly it with him. We would shout, run, laugh. — But by then he, like me, had long since grown a beard.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I also knew there was another way to make amends: ask for his forgiveness, and wait for him to say, "I don't blame you at all." Then my heart would surely feel light — that was indeed a feasible solution. Once when we met, the lines of life's hardships had already been carved deep in both our faces, and my heart was heavy. Gradually we began talking about childhood memories, and I told him about this incident, confessing the foolishness of my youth. "I don't blame you at all" — I thought he was about to say it, I would immediately receive forgiveness, and my heart would be at ease from then on.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Did that really happen?" he said, laughing in surprise, as though hearing someone else's story. He remembered nothing.
| |
| − | | |
| − | When everything is utterly forgotten, without any resentment — what is there to forgive? Forgiveness without resentment is nothing but a lie.
| |
| − | | |
| − | What more can I hope for? My heart can only remain heavy.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Now the spring of my hometown floats again in the sky of this foreign place, bringing me long-vanished childhood memories and with them an ungrasping sorrow. I might as well retreat into the killing severity of winter — but on all sides it is plainly deep winter, pressing upon me with its fierce cold.
| |
| − | | |
| − | January 24, 1925.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第11節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 11 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 好的故事
| |
| − | | |
| − | 灯火渐渐地缩小了,在预告石油的已经不多;石油又不是老牌,早熏得灯罩很昏暗。鞭爆的繁响在四近,烟草的烟雾在身边:是昏沉的夜。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我闭了眼睛,向后一仰,靠在椅背上;捏着《初学记》的手搁在膝髁上。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我在蒙胧中,看见一个好的故事。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 这故事很美丽,幽雅,有趣。许多美的人和美的事,错综起来像一天云锦,而且万颗奔星似的飞动着,同时又展开去,以至于无穷。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我仿佛记得曾坐小船经过山阴道,两岸边的乌桕,新禾,野花,鸡,狗,丛树和枯树,茅屋,塔,伽蓝,农夫和村妇,村女,晒着的衣裳,和尚,蓑笠,天,云,竹,……都倒影在澄碧的小河中,随着每一打桨,各各夹带了闪烁的日光,并水里的萍藻游鱼,一同荡漾。诸影诸物,无不解散,而且摇动,扩大,互相融和;刚一融和,却又退缩,复近于原形。边缘都参差如夏云头,镶着日光,发出水银色焰。凡是我所经过的河,都是如此。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 现在我所见的故事也如此。水中的青天的底子,一切事物统在上面交错,织成一篇,永是生动,永是展开,我看不见这一篇的结束。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 河边枯柳树下的几株瘦削的一丈红,该是村女种的罢。大红花和斑红花,都在水里面浮动,忽而碎散,拉长了,缕缕的胭脂水,然而没有晕。茅屋,狗,塔,村女,云,……也都浮动着。大红花一朵朵全被拉长了,这时是泼剌奔迸的红锦带。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 带织入狗中,狗织入白云中,白云织入村女中……。在一瞬间,他们又将退缩了。但斑红花影也已碎散,伸长,就要织进塔,村女,狗,茅屋,云里去。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 现在我所见的故事清楚起来了,美丽,幽雅,有趣,而且分明。青天上面,有无数美的人和美的事,我一一看见,一一知道。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我就要凝视他们……。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我正要凝视他们时,骤然一惊,睁开眼,云锦也已皱蹙,凌乱,仿佛有谁掷一块大石下河水中,水波陡然起立,将整篇的影子撕成片片了。我无意识地赶忙捏住几乎坠地的《初学记》,眼前还剩着几点虹霓色的碎影。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我真爱这一篇好的故事,趁碎影还在,我要追回他,完成他,留下他。我抛了书,欠身伸手去取笔,——何尝有一丝碎影,只见昏暗的灯光,我不在小船里了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 但我总记得见过这一篇好的故事,在昏沉的夜……。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年二月二十四日。
| |
| − | | A Good Story
| |
| − | | |
| − | The lamp was gradually shrinking, announcing that the kerosene was nearly gone; it was not good kerosene either, and had long since smoked the shade dim. Firecrackers crackled all around, tobacco smoke drifted at my side — it was a drowsy night.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I closed my eyes, leaned back, and rested against the chair; my hand holding the Chuxueji lay on my knee.
| |
| − | | |
| − | In the haze I saw a good story.
| |
| − | | |
| − | This story was very beautiful, elegant, and delightful. Many beautiful people and beautiful things interwove like a sky of cloud brocade, and ten thousand rushing stars seemed to fly within it, unfolding at the same time, endlessly.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I seemed to remember once sitting in a small boat along the Shanyin road, and the tallow trees on both banks, young grain, wildflowers, chickens, dogs, thickets and bare trees, thatched huts, pagodas, temples, farmers and village women, village girls, drying clothes, monks, straw cloaks and hats, sky, clouds, bamboo... — all reflected in the clear, jade-green little river, and with each stroke of the oar, each carried glittering sunlight, together with the duckweed and fish in the water, all rippling together. Every reflection, every object dissolved, swayed, expanded, and merged into one another; but no sooner merged than they drew back, returning nearly to their original forms. Their edges were jagged as summer cloudheads, rimmed with sunlight, sending out a mercurial flame. Every river I had ever traveled was like this.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The story I now saw was the same. Against the blue sky at the bottom of the water, all things crisscrossed, weaving into a single piece, always alive, always unfolding — I could see no end to it.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The few gaunt hollyhocks beneath the withered willow by the riverbank must have been planted by a village girl. Bright red and spotted red blossoms floated in the water, suddenly scattering and stretching into threads of rouge-water, yet without halos. Thatched huts, dogs, pagodas, village girls, clouds... all floated too. The bright red blossoms were each stretched long — now they were wildly splashing red brocade ribbons.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The ribbons wove into the dog, the dog into the white cloud, the white cloud into the village girl... In the next instant they were already drawing back. But the spotted red blossom shadows had also scattered and stretched, about to weave into the pagoda, village girl, dog, thatched hut, and cloud.
| |
| − | | |
| − | The story I saw now became clear — beautiful, elegant, delightful, and distinct. Above the blue sky were countless beautiful people and beautiful things; I saw them one by one, knew them one by one.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I was about to gaze at them intently...
| |
| − | | |
| − | Just as I was about to gaze at them, I started violently, opened my eyes — the cloud brocade was already crumpled and disordered, as if someone had thrown a large stone into the river; the waves shot up sharply, tearing the whole page of reflections to shreds. Unconsciously I clutched the Chuxueji that had nearly fallen to the floor; before my eyes a few rainbow-colored fragments still remained.
| |
| − | | |
| − | How I loved this good story! While the fragments were still there, I wanted to recapture it, complete it, keep it. I threw down the book, leaned forward and reached for the brush — but there was not a single fragment left, only the dim lamplight; I was no longer in the little boat.
| |
| − | | |
| − | But I shall always remember having seen this good story, in the drowsy night...
| |
| − | | |
| − | February 24, 1925.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第12節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 12 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 狗的驳诘
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我梦见自己在隘巷中行走,衣履破碎,像乞食者。一条狗在背后叫起来了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我傲慢地回顾,叱咤说:"呔!住口!你这势利的狗!"
| |
| − | | |
| − | "嘻嘻!"他笑了,还接着说,"不敢,愧不如人呢。""什么!?"我气愤了,觉得这是一个极端的侮辱。"我惭愧:我终于还不知道分别铜和银;还不知道分别布和绸;还不知道分别官和民;还不知道分别主和奴;还不知道……"
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我逃走了。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "且慢!我们再谈谈……"他在后面大声挽留。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我一径逃走,尽力地走,直到逃出梦境,躺在自己的床上。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年四月二十三日。
| |
| − | | The Dog's Retort
| |
| − | | |
| − | I dreamed I was walking through a narrow alley, my clothes and shoes in tatters, like a beggar. A dog began barking behind me.
| |
| − | | |
| − | Haughtily I turned and shouted: "Hey! Silence! You snobbish dog!"
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Hee hee!" He laughed, and went on: "I wouldn't dare — I am ashamed not to be the equal of a human." "What?!" I was furious, feeling this was the ultimate insult. "I am ashamed: I still cannot tell copper from silver; still cannot tell cotton from silk; still cannot tell officials from commoners; still cannot tell masters from slaves; still cannot..."
| |
| − | | |
| − | I fled.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Wait! Let us talk a bit more..." He called loudly after me.
| |
| − | | |
| − | I fled straight ahead, as fast as I could, until I fled out of the dream and lay in my own bed.
| |
| − | | |
| − | April 23, 1925.
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | === 第13節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 13 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 失掉的好地狱
| |
| − | | |
| − | 我梦见自己躺在床上,在荒寒的野外,地狱的旁边。一切鬼魂们的叫唤无不低微,然有秩序,与火焰的怒吼,油的沸腾,钢叉的震颤相和鸣,造成醉心的大乐,布告三界:地下太平。
| |
| − | | |
| − | 有一伟大的男子站在我面前,美丽,慈悲,遍身有大光辉,然而我知道他是魔鬼。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "一切都已完结,一切都已完结!可怜的鬼魂们将那好的地狱失掉了!"他悲愤地说,于是坐下,讲给我一个他所知道的故事——
| |
| − | | |
| − | "天地作蜂蜜色的时候,就是魔鬼战胜天神,掌握了主宰一切的大威权的时候。他收得天国,收得人间,也收得地狱。他于是亲临地狱,坐在中央,遍身发大光辉,照见一切鬼众。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "地狱原已废弛得很久了:剑树消却光芒;沸油的边际早不腾涌;大火聚有时不过冒些青烟,远处还萌生曼陀罗花,花极细小,惨白可怜。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "鬼魂们在冷油温火里醒来,从魔鬼的光辉中看见地狱小花,惨白可怜,被大蛊惑,倏忽间记起人世,默想至不知几多年,遂同时向着人间,发一声反狱的绝叫。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "人类便应声而起,仗义执言,与魔鬼战斗。终于运大谋略,布大网罗,使魔鬼并且不得不从地狱出走。最后的胜利,是地狱门上也竖了人类的旌旗!
| |
| − | | |
| − | "当鬼魂们一齐欢呼时,人类的整饬地狱使者已临地狱,坐在中央,用了人类的威严,叱咤一切鬼众。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "当鬼魂们又发一声反狱的绝叫时,即已成为人类的叛徒,得到永劫沉沦的罚,迁入剑树林的中央。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "人类于是完全掌握了主宰地狱的大威权,那威棱且在魔鬼以上。人类于是整顿废弛,先给牛首阿旁以最高的俸草;而且,添薪加火,磨砺刀山,使地狱全体改观,一洗先前颓废的气象。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "曼陀罗花立即焦枯了。油一样沸;刀一样锋;火一样热;鬼众一样呻吟,一样宛转,至于都不暇记起失掉的好地狱。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "这是人类的成功,是鬼魂的不幸……。
| |
| − | | |
| − | "朋友,你在猜疑我了。是的,你是人!我且去寻野兽和恶鬼……。"
| |
| − | | |
| − | 一九二五年六月十六日。
| |
| − | | The Good Hell Lost
| |
| − | | |
| − | I dreamed I lay on my bed in a desolate, frozen wilderness, beside Hell. The cries of all the ghosts were hushed yet orderly, harmonizing with the roar of flames, the boiling of oil, the vibration of steel pitchforks, creating an intoxicating great music that proclaimed to all three realms: peace in the underworld.
| |
| − | | |
| − | A magnificent man stood before me, beautiful, compassionate, his whole body radiant — but I knew he was the Devil.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "All is over, all is over! The pitiful ghosts have lost their good Hell!" he said in grief and fury, sat down, and told me a story he knew —
| |
| − | | |
| − | "When heaven and earth turned honey-colored, that was when the Devil defeated the gods and seized the great power to rule all things. He took the Kingdom of Heaven, took the human world, and took Hell. He appeared in person in Hell, sat at its center, his whole body radiant, illuminating all the ghosts.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Hell had long been in disrepair: the sword-trees had lost their gleam; the boiling oil no longer surged at its edges; the great fire-masses sometimes produced only wisps of blue smoke, and in the distance mandara flowers sprouted, tiny and pitifully pale.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "The ghosts awoke in cold oil and lukewarm fire, saw the little Hell-flowers in the Devil's radiance, pitifully pale, and were deeply bewitched; in an instant they remembered the human world, meditated for no one knows how many years, and then all together, facing the human world, uttered a single cry of rebellion against Hell. | |
| − | | |
| − | "Humanity answered at once, championed justice, and fought the Devil. At last deploying great strategies and casting great nets, they forced the Devil to flee from Hell. The final victory: humanity's banner now stood upon the gates of Hell!
| |
| − | | |
| − | "When the ghosts cheered in unison, humanity's emissary for reorganizing Hell had already arrived, sat at the center, and with human authority commanded all the ghosts.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "When the ghosts uttered another cry of rebellion, they had already become traitors to humanity and received the punishment of eternal damnation — exiled to the heart of the sword-tree forest.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Humanity now held full sway over Hell — and their authority exceeded even the Devil's. Humanity set the decay in order: first they gave the ox-headed wardens the highest fodder; then they stoked the fires, sharpened the knife-mountains, and transformed Hell entirely, washing away every trace of its former decline.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "The mandara flowers withered at once. The oil boiled as before; the blades cut as before; the fire burned as before; the ghosts groaned as before, writhed as before — until they had no leisure to remember the good Hell they had lost.
| |
| − | | |
| − | "This is humanity's triumph and the ghosts' misfortune...
| |
| − | | |
| − | "Friend, you are beginning to suspect me. Yes, you are a human! I shall go seek wild beasts and evil spirits..."
| |
| − | | |
| − | June 16, 1925.
| |
| − | |- | |
| − | | === 第14節 ===
| |
| − | | === Section 14 ===
| |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 墓碣文
| |
| | | | |
| | 我梦见自己正和墓碣对立,读着上面的刻辞。那墓碣似是沙石所制,剥落很多,又有苔藓丛生,仅存有限的文句—— | | 我梦见自己正和墓碣对立,读着上面的刻辞。那墓碣似是沙石所制,剥落很多,又有苔藓丛生,仅存有限的文句—— |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年六月十七日。 | | 一九二五年六月十七日。 |
| − | | Epitaph
| |
| | | | |
| − | I dreamed I stood facing a tombstone, reading its inscription. The stone seemed made of sandstone, much worn away, covered with thick moss, only a few lines remaining —
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 墓碣の文 |
| | | | |
| − | ...he caught a chill in the midst of ecstatic song; from heaven he saw the abyss. In all eyes he saw nothingness; in utter hopelessness he found salvation...
| + | 私は夢の中で自分が墓碣と向かい合い、その上の刻辞を読んでいた。その墓碣は砂岩で造られたものらしく、剥落が甚だしく、また苔蘚が叢生し、わずかに限られた文句が残っているのみであった—— |
| | | | |
| − | ...a wandering soul transformed into a long serpent, with venomous fangs. Not to bite others — it bit itself, until it perished...
| + | ……壮歌狂熱のさなかに寒に中(あた)り、天上に深淵を見る。一切の眼に無を見、無望のうちに救われる。…… |
| | | | |
| − | ...Depart!...
| + | ……一つの遊魂あり、化して長蛇となる。口に毒牙あり。もって人を噛まず、自ら己が身を噛み、ついに殞顛す。…… |
| | | | |
| − | I went around to the back and then saw the solitary grave, barren of grass and trees, already crumbling. Through the great crack I glimpsed the corpse — chest and abdomen torn open, heart and liver gone. Yet the face showed no expression of sorrow or joy, only a haze like smoke.
| + | ……去れ!…… |
| | | | |
| − | In fear and doubt I could not turn fast enough, yet I had already read the remaining words on the reverse of the stone —
| + | 私は碣の裏に回ると、はじめて孤墳が見えた。上に草木はなく、すでに頽壊していた。大きな欠け口から覗くと、死骸が見え、胸腹ともに裂け、中に心肝はなかった。しかし顔にはまったく哀楽の色を見せず、ただ朦々として煙のようであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | ...to tear out one's own heart and eat it, to know its true taste. The pain of the wound is so cruel — how can one know the true taste?...
| + | 私は疑惧のうちに振り返る暇もなかったが、すでに墓碣の陰面に残された文句が目に入っていた—— |
| | | | |
| − | ...when the pain subsides, eat it slowly. But the heart has already grown old — how then can one know the true taste?...
| + | ……心を抉りて自ら食い、本味を知らんと欲す。創痛酷烈にして、本味いかんぞ知り得ん。…… |
| | | | |
| − | ...Answer me. Otherwise — depart!...
| + | ……痛み定まりし後、徐々にこれを食う。されどその心すでに陳旧なれば、本味またいかにして知り得ん。…… |
| | | | |
| − | I was about to leave. But the corpse had sat up in the grave, lips unmoving, yet it spoke —
| + | ……我に答えよ。さもなくば、去れ!…… |
| | | | |
| − | "When I have become dust, you will see my smile!"
| + | 私はまさに去ろうとした。ところが死骸はすでに墓の中で起き上がり、口唇は動かさずに、しかし言った—— |
| | | | |
| − | I hurried away, not daring to look back, fearing to see it following me.
| + | 「私が塵と成る時、汝はわが微笑を見るであろう!」 |
| | | | |
| − | June 17, 1925.
| + | 私は疾く走り、振り返る勇気もなかった。彼が追ってくるのを見ることを恐れたのだ。 |
| − | |-
| + | |
| − | | === 第15節 ===
| + | 一九二五年六月十七日。 |
| − | | === Section 15 ===
| |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | 立论 | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 立论 |
| | | | |
| | 我梦见自己正在小学校的讲堂上预备作文,向老师请教立论的方法。 | | 我梦见自己正在小学校的讲堂上预备作文,向老师请教立论的方法。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年七月八日。 | | 一九二五年七月八日。 |
| − | | On Argument
| |
| | | | |
| − | I dreamed I was in the classroom of my primary school, preparing a composition, asking my teacher about the method of argument.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 立論 |
| | | | |
| − | "Difficult!" The teacher looked at me, his gaze shooting sideways over the rim of his spectacles. "Let me tell you something —
| + | 私は夢の中で自分が小学校の教室で作文の準備をしており、先生に立論の方法を教えてもらおうとしていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "A family had a boy, and the whole household was overjoyed. When the baby was one month old, they brought him out to show the guests — naturally hoping for a few auspicious remarks.
| + | 「難しいな!」先生は眼鏡の縁の外から斜めに視線を射て、私を見つめて言った。「一つ話を聞かせよう—— |
| | | | |
| − | "One said: 'This child will be rich someday.' He received hearty thanks.
| + | 「ある家に男の子が生まれ、一家中この上なく喜んだ。満月の祝いの時、客人に見せるために抱き出した。——おそらく自然と良い兆しの言葉が欲しかったのだろう。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Another said: 'This child will be an official someday.' He received a few compliments in return.
| + | 「一人が言った。『この子は将来きっと金持ちになりますよ。』彼はそこで一通りの感謝を受けた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Yet another said: 'This child will die someday.' He received a sound beating from everyone together.
| + | 「一人が言った。『この子は将来きっと偉い役人になりますよ。』彼はそこでいくつかのお世辞を返された。 |
| | | | |
| − | "That the child will die is certain; that he will be rich and noble is probably a lie. Yet the liar is rewarded, and the truth-teller is beaten. Now you..."
| + | 「一人が言った。『この子は将来きっと死にますよ。』彼はそこで皆から寄ってたかってひどく殴られた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "I would like neither to lie nor to be beaten. Then, teacher, how should I put it?"
| + | 「死ぬと言ったのは必然であり、富貴と言ったのは偽りであった。しかし偽りを言った者は良い報いを受け、必然を言った者は殴られた。君は……」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Then you must say: 'Ah! This child! Just look! How... Oh my! Ha ha! Hehe! He, hehehehe!'"
| + | 「私は人を偽りたくもなく、殴られたくもありません。では先生、私はどう言えばよいのでしょうか?」 |
| | | | |
| − | July 8, 1925.
| + | 「ならば、こう言うのだ。『おやまあ!この赤ちゃんったら!ご覧なさい!なんと……。あらまあ!ははは!へへ!へ、へへへへ!』」 |
| | + | |
| | + | 一九二五年七月八日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第16節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 16 === | + | 死火 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 死火
| |
| | | | |
| | 我梦见自己在冰山间奔驰。 | | 我梦见自己在冰山间奔驰。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年四月二十三日。 | | 一九二五年四月二十三日。 |
| − | | Dead Fire
| |
| | | | |
| − | I dreamed I was racing among icebergs.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 死火 |
| | | | |
| − | Towering icebergs reaching to the frozen sky; overhead, frozen clouds like fish scales. At the foot of the mountains, a forest of ice trees with branches and needles like pine and fir. Everything freezing, everything pale blue-white.
| + | 私は夢の中で自分が氷山の間を疾駆していた。 |
| | | | |
| − | Then suddenly I fell into an ice valley.
| + | そこは高大な氷山で、上は氷の天に接し、天には凍雲が瀰漫し、片片として魚鱗のような模様であった。山麓には氷の樹林があり、枝葉はすべて松杉のようであった。一切が氷冷で、一切が青白かった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Above, below, on all sides — freezing, pale blue-white. Yet upon all the pale blue-white ice lay countless red shadows, tangled like a coral net. I looked down at my feet — there was fire.
| + | ところが私は突然、氷谷の中に墜ちた。 |
| | | | |
| − | It was dead fire. It had the shape of blazing flames, yet did not stir in the least, frozen solid like coral branches; at its tip, solidified black smoke, as though it had just emerged from a burning house and was therefore scorched. Thus reflected in the ice walls all around, and the reflections reflecting each other, multiplied into infinity, turning the ice valley the color of red coral.
| + | 上下四方いずれも氷冷で、青白かった。しかし一切の青白い氷の上には、紅い影が無数にあり、珊瑚の網のように絡み合っていた。俯いて足元を見ると、そこに火焔があった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Ha ha!
| + | これが死火であった。炎々たる形をしているが、少しも揺れ動かず、全体が氷結し、珊瑚の枝のようであった。先端にはなお凝固した黒煙があり、おそらく火宅から出たばかりで、それゆえ枯れ焦げたのだろう。こうして氷の四壁に映り、しかも互いに映じ合い、無量数の影と化して、この氷谷を紅珊瑚色に変えていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | As a child I loved to watch the spray raised by swift ships and the fierce flames shooting from blast furnaces. Not only did I love to watch — I wanted to see clearly. But alas, they were ever-changing, never still. No matter how I stared, no fixed image remained. Dead flame, now I have found you at last!
| + | ははは! |
| | | | |
| − | I picked up the dead fire, about to examine it closely, but the cold seared my fingers; still I endured and stuffed it into my pocket. The ice valley all around turned instantly pale blue-white again. I pondered how to escape.
| + | 幼い頃の私は、もともと快速の艦が激しく起こす波花や、洪炉が噴き出す烈焔を見るのが好きだった。見るだけでなく、はっきり見極めたいとも思った。惜しむらくは、それらは刻々と変幻し、永久に定まった形がなかった。凝視に凝視を重ねても、ついぞ確かな痕跡を留めなかった。死んだ火焔よ、今ついにお前を手に入れた! |
| | | | |
| − | A thread of black smoke rose from my body like an iron-wire snake. The ice valley was instantly filled with flowing red flames, a great conflagration surrounding me. I looked down — the dead fire was burning, had burned through my clothes, and flowed upon the ice floor.
| + | 私は死火を拾い上げ、まさに仔細に見ようとしたが、その冷気がすでに指先を焦灼させていた。しかし、私はなお耐え忍んで、彼を衣嚢の中に押し込んだ。氷谷の四面はたちまち完全に青白くなった。私は氷谷を脱け出す方法を考えながら歩いた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Ah, friend! With your warmth you have awakened me," it said.
| + | 私の身体から一縷の黒煙が噴き出し、鉄線蛇のように上昇した。氷谷の四面にはまたたちまち紅焔が流動し、大火聚のように私を包囲した。俯いて見ると、死火はすでに燃え上がり、私の衣裳を焼き破って、氷の地に流れ落ちていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | I hastily greeted it and asked its name.
| + | 「ああ、友よ!君は己の温熱をもって、私を目覚めさせてくれた。」と彼は言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "I was once abandoned in this ice valley," it said, not answering the question. "Those who abandoned me perished and vanished long ago. I too was nearly frozen to death. Had you not given me your warmth and made me burn again, I would soon have been extinguished."
| + | 私は急いで彼に挨拶をし、名を尋ねた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Your awakening delights me. I was just thinking of how to escape this ice valley; I wish to carry you with me, so that you never freeze again and may burn forever."
| + | 「私はもともと人に棄てられてこの氷谷の中にいた。」と彼は答えにならぬ答えを言った。「私を棄てた者はとうに滅亡し、消え尽した。私もまた氷に凍えて死にかけていた。もし君が温熱を与えてくれず、再び燃え上がらせてくれなければ、私はまもなく滅亡するところであった。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Alas! Then I shall burn out!"
| + | 「君の目覚めは、私を喜ばせる。私はいま氷谷を出る方法を考えているところだ。君を携えて行き、永久に氷結させず、永久に燃え続けさせたいのだ。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Your burning out would grieve me. Then I shall leave you here."
| + | 「ああ!それでは、私は燃え尽きてしまう!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Alas! Then I shall freeze and be extinguished!"
| + | 「君が燃え尽きるのは惜しい。ならば君をここに残しておこう。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Then what shall we do?"
| + | 「ああ!それでは、私は凍え滅びてしまう!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "But you yourself — what will you do?" it asked in return.
| + | 「ならば、どうすればよいのか?」 |
| | | | |
| − | "I have already said: I want to get out of this ice valley..."
| + | 「しかし君自身は、どうするのか?」と彼はかえって問うた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Then I had better burn out!"
| + | 「言ったではないか。私はこの氷谷を出たいのだ……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | It suddenly leaped up like a red comet, carrying me out of the mouth of the ice valley. A great stone cart came racing toward us; I was crushed to death beneath its wheels — but I still had time to see the cart plunge into the ice valley.
| + | 「ならば私はいっそ燃え尽きたほうがよい!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Ha ha! You will never encounter dead fire again!" I said, laughing triumphantly, as if I wanted it this way.
| + | 彼はたちまち跳躍し、紅い彗星のように、私もろとも氷谷の口の外に出た。大きな石車が突然疾駆して来て、私はついに車輪の下に轢かれて死んだ。だが、私はまだ間に合ってその車が氷谷の中に墜ちるのを見ることができた。 |
| | | | |
| − | April 23, 1925.
| + | 「ははは!お前たちはもう二度と死火に巡り会えないぞ!」私は得意げに笑って言った。まるでそう願っていたかのように。 |
| | + | |
| | + | 一九二五年四月二十三日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第17節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 17 === | + | 腊叶 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 腊叶
| |
| | | | |
| | 灯下看《雁门集》,忽然翻出一片压干的枫叶来。 | | 灯下看《雁门集》,忽然翻出一片压干的枫叶来。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 | | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 |
| − | | Pressed Leaf
| |
| | | | |
| − | Reading the Yanmen-ji under the lamp, a pressed, dried maple leaf suddenly fell from the pages.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 臘葉 |
| | + | |
| | + | 灯下で『雁門集』を読んでいると、ふと一枚の押し乾かされた楓の葉がはらりと出てきた。 |
| | | | |
| − | This reminded me of late autumn last year. Heavy frost had fallen in the night, most leaves already shed, and the little maple tree in front of the courtyard had turned red. I had paced around the tree, examining the colors of the leaves closely — when they were green I had never paid such attention. The whole tree was not red; most leaves were pale crimson, and a few bore patches of deep green on a scarlet ground. One leaf alone had a tiny wormhole, edged in black, and amid the mottling of red, yellow, and green, it gazed at you like a bright eye. I thought: this is a diseased leaf! So I plucked it and placed it in the Yanmen-ji I had just bought. I suppose I wished these colors — moth-eaten yet splendid, about to fall — might be preserved a while, and not scatter with all the other leaves.
| + | これで去年の晩秋のことを思い出した。霜が繁く夜ごとに降り、木の葉は大方散り落ちて、庭先の一本の小さな楓の木も紅く色づいていた。私はその木のまわりを巡り歩き、葉の色を仔細に眺めた。青々と繁っていた頃にはこれほど注意したことはなかった。木もまた全体が真紅というわけではなく、最も多いのは淡い紅で、数枚は緋紅の地にまだ濃い緑の塊を帯びていた。一枚だけ虫喰いの穴が一つあり、その縁は烏黒い花縁のように見え、紅・黄・緑の斑模様の中で、明眸のように人を凝視していた。私は思った——これは病葉だ! そこで摘み取って、たった今買ったばかりの『雁門集』に挟んだ。おそらくは、この今にも散ろうとする、蝕まれて斑爛たる色を、しばし保存し、群葉とともにすぐに散り飛ばないようにしたかったのだろう。 |
| | | | |
| − | But tonight it lies before me, wax-yellow, and that eye no longer glows as it did last year. In a few more years, when the old colors have faded from my memory, perhaps even I will not know why it lies pressed between these pages. The splendor of the diseased leaf, about to fall, can apparently only be contemplated for the briefest moment — how much less the lush green. Looking out the window, even the hardiest trees have long since lost their leaves; the maple tree needs no mentioning. In late autumn there must be diseased leaves similar to last year's — but sadly, this year I have had no leisure to admire the autumn trees.
| + | しかし今夜、その葉は蠟のように黄ばんで目の前に横たわり、あの瞳もまた去年のように灼々とは輝いていなかった。もし更に数年が過ぎ、昔の色が記憶から消え去れば、おそらく私自身でさえ、なぜこの葉が本に挟まっていたかの理由を知らなくなるだろう。散ろうとする病葉の斑爛は、どうやらごく短い時の中でしか向き合えぬもののようだ。まして青々と繁っていた頃はなおさらのことだ。窓の外を見れば、寒さに強い木々もとうに葉を落とし尽している。楓の木はなおさら言うまでもない。晩秋の頃、おそらく去年のそれに似た病葉もあったことだろうが、惜しいことに今年の私には秋の木を賞翫する余暇がまったくなかった。 |
| | | | |
| − | December 26, 1925.
| + | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第18節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 18 === | + | 颓败线的颤动 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 颓败线的颤动
| |
| | | | |
| | 我梦见自己在做梦。自身不知所在,眼前却有一间在深夜中紧闭的小屋的内部,但也看见屋上瓦松的茂密的森林。 | | 我梦见自己在做梦。自身不知所在,眼前却有一间在深夜中紧闭的小屋的内部,但也看见屋上瓦松的茂密的森林。 |
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| | 一九二五年六月二十九日。 | | 一九二五年六月二十九日。 |
| − | | The Tremor of the Line of Decay
| |
| | | | |
| − | I dreamed I was dreaming. I did not know where I was, yet before my eyes was the interior of a small hut, tightly shut in deep night — and at the same time I saw the dense forest of houseleek upon the roof.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 頽敗線の顫動 |
| | + | |
| | + | 私は夢の中で自分が夢を見ていた。自分がどこにいるのか分からなかったが、目の前には深夜に固く閉ざされた小屋の内部が見え、同時にまた屋根の上の瓦松の繁茂した森も見えていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | The lampshade on the plank table had been freshly wiped, making the hut unusually bright. In the brightness, on the tattered bed, beneath a massive, hairy, unknown bulk of flesh, a frail and tiny body trembled — with hunger, pain, astonishment, shame, and joy. The slack yet still plump skin gleamed; the pale cheeks flushed faintly, as if rouge had been painted on lead.
| + | 板卓の上の灯罩は新しく拭かれたもので、部屋の中を格別明るく照らしていた。その明るみの中で、破れた寝台の上で、初めて見知らぬ毛むくじゃらの屈強な肉塊の下に、痩せて矮小な身体があり、飢え、苦痛、驚愕、恥辱、歓喜に顫えていた。弛緩してはいるがなお豊かな肌膚は艶やかに光り、青白い両頰にほのかな紅が差し、鉛に胭脂水を塗ったようであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | The lamp too shrank with fright; dawn was already breaking in the east.
| + | 灯火もまた恐れのために小さく縮み、東方はすでに白みかけていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | Yet in the air still rippled the waves of hunger, pain, astonishment, shame, and joy...
| + | しかし空中にはなお飢え、苦痛、驚愕、恥辱、歓喜の波涛が瀰漫と揺れ動いていた……。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Mama!" A girl of about two, startled awake by the sound of the door, called out from the corner where she lay on the floor, surrounded by rush mats.
| + | 「母さん!」二歳ほどの女の子が戸の開閉の音に目を覚まし、草席で囲われた部屋の隅の地面の上で叫んだ。 |
| | | | |
| − | "It's still early, sleep a bit more!" she said in alarm.
| + | 「まだ早いよ、もう少しお眠り!」と彼女はうろたえて言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Mama! I'm hungry, my stomach hurts. Will we have anything to eat today?"
| + | 「母さん! お腹が空いた、お腹が痛い。今日は何か食べられるの?」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Today we have food. Soon the sesame-cake seller will come, and Mama will buy some for you." Relieved, she gripped the small silver coin in her palm more tightly; her faint voice trembled with sorrow as she walked to the corner, looked at her daughter, moved the mat aside, and lifted her onto the tattered bed.
| + | 「今日は食べるものがあるよ。もう少しすると焼餅売りが来るから、母さんが買ってあげるよ。」彼女は安堵しながら掌中の小さな銀片をいっそう強く握りしめ、低い声は悲しげに震え、部屋の隅に歩み寄って娘を見て、草席をどかし、抱き上げて破れた寝台に置いた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "It's still early, sleep a bit more," she said, and at the same time raised her eyes and gazed — with nothing to tell anyone — at the sky above the dilapidated roof.
| + | 「まだ早いよ、もう少しお眠り。」と彼女は言い、同時に目を上げ、告げるすべもないまなざしで、破れた屋根越しの天空をちらと見た。 |
| | | | |
| − | Suddenly a great new wave arose in the air, colliding with the former, swirling into a vortex, engulfing everything including me; I could not breathe through mouth or nose.
| + | 空中に突然また別の大きな波涛が起こり、先のそれと衝突し、旋回して渦巻きとなり、一切を、そして私をも残らず呑み込んだ。口も鼻も呼吸できなかった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Groaning, I awoke; outside the window lay silver moonlight, and dawn seemed still far off.
| + | 私は呻きながら目を覚ました。窓の外は銀色の月光に満ち、夜明けまではまだはるかに遠いようであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | I did not know where I was, yet before my eyes was the interior of a small hut shut tight in deep night — I knew I was continuing the dream. But many years had passed. The hut was now tidy inside and out; within were a young couple and a brood of children, all glaring at an aged woman with resentment and contempt.
| + | 自分がどこにいるのか分からなかったが、目の前には深夜に固く閉ざされた小屋の内部があり、夢の続きだと自ら知っていた。だが夢の時代は幾年も隔たっていた。小屋の内外はすでにこのように整い、中には若い夫婦と子供たちの一群がおり、皆が怨恨と軽蔑の目で一人の老いた女を見ていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "We can't show our faces to anyone, and it's all because of you," the man said angrily. "You think you raised her, but you actually ruined her — it would have been better if she'd starved to death as a child!"
| + | 「俺たちが人に顔向けできないのは、すべてお前のせいだ。」男が憤然として言った。「お前はまだ彼女を育てたつもりだろうが、実は害したのだ。いっそ小さい時に飢え死にさせたほうがましだった!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "You're the one who made my whole life a humiliation!" the woman said.
| + | 「私を一生恥ずかしめたのはお前だ!」女が言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "And you've dragged me down too!" the man said.
| + | 「おまけに俺にまで累を及ぼした!」男が言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "And them too!" the woman said, pointing at the children.
| + | 「おまけにこの子たちにまで累が及ぶのだ!」女が子供たちを指して言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | The youngest was playing with a dry reed leaf; now he swung it through the air like a steel sword and cried: "Kill!"
| + | 最も幼い子が枯れた芦の葉を一枚もて遊んでいたが、この時それを空に向かって一振りし、まるで鋼の刀のように、大声で叫んだ。「殺せ!」 |
| | | | |
| − | The corners of the old woman's mouth convulsed; for a moment she froze, then everything grew calm. Before long, she stood up coldly, bony as a stone statue. She opened the plank door, stepped out into the deep night, leaving behind all the cold curses and venomous laughter.
| + | 老女は口の端がまさに痙攣していたが、たちまち一瞬ぴくりとし、続いてすべてが静まった。ほどなく、彼女は冷然と、骨ばった石像のように立ち上がった。板戸を開け、深夜の中へ歩み出した。背後の一切の冷罵と毒笑を棄て去って。 |
| | | | |
| − | She walked and walked in the deep night, until she reached a boundless wilderness; on all sides wilderness, above only the high sky, not a single insect or bird in flight. Naked, standing like a stone statue in the center of the wilderness, in a single instant she saw all of the past: hunger, pain, astonishment, shame, joy — and she trembled; harm, humiliation, ruin — and she convulsed; kill — and she grew calm. ...In another instant she merged everything together: longing and severance, tenderness and revenge, nurture and annihilation, blessing and curse... Then she raised both hands as high as she could toward the sky, and from between her lips there escaped sounds half human, half beast, not of the human world, and therefore without words.
| + | 彼女は深夜の中をひたすら歩き、果てのない荒野まで歩いた。四方すべて荒野であり、頭上にはただ高い空があるばかりで、一匹の虫も一羽の鳥も飛び過ぎなかった。彼女は赤裸のまま、石像のように荒野の只中に立ち、一刹那のうちに過ぎし一切を照覧した。飢え、苦痛、驚愕、恥辱、歓喜、そして身を震わせ、害され、辱められ、累を及ぼされ、そして痙攣し、殺せ、そして静まり……。またも一刹那のうちに一切を合一した。眷恋と決絶、愛撫と復讐、養育と殲滅、祝福と呪詛……。彼女はそこで両手を天に向かって力の限り挙げ、口唇の間から人のものとも獣のものともつかぬ、人の世にあらざるがゆえに言葉なき言語が漏れた。 |
| | | | |
| − | When she uttered this wordless speech, the entire surface of her great body — like a stone statue, yet already abandoned and decayed — trembled. This trembling was like fish scales, point by point, each scale heaving like boiling water over fierce flame; the air instantly trembled with it, like the waves of a desolate sea in a tempest.
| + | 彼女が言葉なき言語を発した時、石像のごとく偉大な、しかしすでに荒廃し頽敗したその身体の全面が顫動した。その顫動は点々として魚鱗のごとく、一枚一枚の鱗が烈火の上の沸騰する水のように起伏した。空中もまたたちまち同時に振顫し、さながら暴風雨の中の荒海の波涛のようであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Then she raised her eyes to the sky, and even the wordless speech fell utterly silent; only the trembling remained, radiating like sunlight, sending the airborne waves into an immediate whirl, as if struck by a hurricane, surging wildly across the boundless wilderness.
| + | 彼女はそこで目を上げて天空を仰いだ。言葉なき言語もまた沈黙し尽くし、ただ顫動のみが太陽光のごとく放射し、空中の波涛をたちまち旋回させ、颶風に遭ったかのように果てのない荒野に洶湧奔騰した。 |
| | | | |
| − | I was having a nightmare — but I knew it was because I had placed my hand on my chest; in the dream I used all my strength to move that terribly heavy hand away.
| + | 私は夢魘(うなさ)れていたが、自分でそれは手を胸の上に置いたせいだと分かっていた。夢の中でもなお平生の力を尽くして、この重い手をどけようとしていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | June 29, 1925.
| + | 一九二五年六月二十九日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第19節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 19 === | + | 淡淡的血痕中 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 淡淡的血痕中
| |
| | | | |
| | ——记念几个死者和生者和未生者 | | ——记念几个死者和生者和未生者 |
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| | 一九二六年四月八日。 | | 一九二六年四月八日。 |
| − | | Amid Faint Bloodstains
| |
| | | | |
| − | — In memory of certain dead, living, and yet unborn
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 淡い血痕の中で |
| | + | |
| | + | ——数人の死者と生者と未だ生まれざる者を記念して |
| | | | |
| − | The Creator of our time is still a coward.
| + | 今の造物主はなお一個の怯懦者である。 |
| | | | |
| − | In secret he makes heaven and earth change, yet dares not destroy this planet; in secret he makes living things decay, yet dares not preserve all corpses forever; in secret he makes humanity bleed, yet dares not keep the color of blood forever fresh; in secret he makes humanity suffer, yet dares not let humanity remember forever.
| + | 彼は密かに天地を変異させるが、あえてこの地球を毀滅しはしない。密かに生物を衰亡させるが、あえて一切の屍体を長く留めはしない。密かに人類に血を流させるが、あえて血の色を永遠に鮮やかに保ちはしない。密かに人類を苦しませるが、あえて人類に永遠に記憶させはしない。 |
| | | | |
| − | He thinks only of his own kind — the cowards among humanity. He uses ruins and deserted graves to set off fine houses; he uses time to dilute suffering and bloodstains; day after day he pours out a cup of bittersweet wine, neither too little nor too much, just enough for a slight intoxication, and hands it to the human world, so that the drinkers may weep and sing, half awake, half drunk, half knowing, half ignorant, half wanting to die, half wanting to live. He must ensure that all want to live too; he has not yet the courage to annihilate humanity.
| + | 彼はもっぱら同類のために——人類の中の怯懦者のために考えを巡らし、廃墟と荒墳で華屋を引き立たせ、時の流れで苦痛と血痕を薄めさせる。日ごとにほのかに甘い苦酒を一杯注ぎ出し、少なすぎず多すぎず、ほどよく酔えるだけを人間に差し出す。飲む者は泣くこともでき、歌うこともでき、覚めているようでもあり酔っているようでもあり、知るようでもあり知らぬようでもあり、死を欲するようでもあり生を欲するようでもある。彼はすべての者に生を欲せしめねばならない。彼にはまだ人類を滅ぼし尽くす勇気がないのだ。 |
| | | | |
| − | A few ruins and deserted graves lie scattered upon the earth, reflected in faint bloodstains; among them people chew upon the dim sorrow of self and others. But they will not spit it out, for they think it better than emptiness, each calling themselves "the heaven-punished," to justify their chewing of dim sorrow, and tremblingly await the coming of new sorrows. The new — it frightens them, yet they long to encounter it.
| + | 幾片かの廃墟と幾つかの荒墳が地上に散在し、淡い血痕に照り映えて、人々はその間で己と他者の茫漠たる悲苦を咀嚼している。しかし吐き棄てようとはせず、空虚よりはましだと思い、おのおの自ら「天の戮民」と称して、己と他者の茫漠たる悲苦を咀嚼することの弁解とし、しかも息を潜めて静かに新たな悲苦の到来を待つ。新たな——それゆえ恐れ、しかもまた巡り会いたいと渇望する。 |
| | | | |
| − | These are all the Creator's good citizens. He needs them just so.
| + | これらはすべて造物主の良民である。彼はまさにこのような者を必要としている。 |
| | | | |
| − | But from the human world emerges the rebellious hero; he stands tall, seeing through all the ruins and deserted graves, past and present, remembering all deep, vast, and ancient suffering, facing all the layered clotted blood, knowing all the dead, the just-born, the soon-to-be-born, and the unborn. He has seen through the Creator's tricks; he will rise to awaken humanity — or to annihilate these good citizens of the Creator utterly.
| + | 叛逆の猛士が人の世に出ずる。彼は屹立して、一切の過去の、そして現在の廃墟と荒墳を見通し、一切の深く広く久しい苦痛を記憶し、一切の幾重にも淤積した凝血を正視し、一切のすでに死せるもの、いま生まれんとするもの、やがて生まれるもの、未だ生まれざるものを深く知る。彼は造化の手品を見破った。彼はまさに立ち上がらんとする。人類を蘇生させるか、さもなくば人類を滅ぼし尽くすか——これら造物主の良民たちを。 |
| | | | |
| − | The Creator, the coward, is ashamed, and hides. Heaven and earth change color in the hero's eyes.
| + | 造物主は、怯懦者は、恥じ入って、身を潜めた。天地は猛士の眼中に色を変えた。 |
| | | | |
| − | April 8, 1926.
| + | 一九二六年四月八日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第20節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 20 === | + | 这样的战士 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 这样的战士
| |
| | | | |
| | 要有这样的一种战士——已不是蒙昧如非洲土人而背着雪亮的毛瑟枪的;也并不疲惫如中国绿营兵而却佩着盒子炮。他毫无乞灵于牛皮和废铁的甲胄;他只有自己,但拿着蛮人所用的,脱手一掷的投枪。 | | 要有这样的一种战士——已不是蒙昧如非洲土人而背着雪亮的毛瑟枪的;也并不疲惫如中国绿营兵而却佩着盒子炮。他毫无乞灵于牛皮和废铁的甲胄;他只有自己,但拿着蛮人所用的,脱手一掷的投枪。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年十二月十四日。 | | 一九二五年十二月十四日。 |
| − | | Such a Warrior
| |
| | | | |
| − | There should be such a warrior — no longer ignorant as an African native carrying a gleaming Mauser rifle; nor exhausted as a Chinese Green Standard soldier yet wearing a Mauser pistol. He has no armor of cowhide and scrap iron; he has only himself, but he carries the barbarian's javelin, thrown with a single cast.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | このような戦士 |
| | + | |
| | + | このような戦士がいなければならない——もはやアフリカの土人のごとく蒙昧でありながらぴかぴかのモーゼル銃を背負った者ではなく、また中国の緑営兵のごとく疲弊しながらもボックス砲を佩びた者でもない。彼は牛皮や廃鉄の甲冑に頼ることはいっさいしない。彼にはただ己れ自身があるのみで、手には蛮人の用いる、手から放つ投槍を握っている。 |
| | | | |
| − | He enters the ranks of Nothingness; all he meets nod at him in the same way. He knows this nodding is the enemy's weapon, a weapon that kills without bloodshed; many warriors have perished by it, as by artillery shells — even the bravest cannot bring their strength to bear.
| + | 彼は無物の陣に入ってゆく。出会うものはすべて一様に彼に頷く。彼はこの頷きこそが敵の武器であり、人を殺して血を見せぬ武器であることを知っている。多くの戦士がここで滅んだのだ。まさに砲弾のごとく、猛士をして力を発揮する術なからしめる。 |
| | | | |
| − | On their heads they bear all manner of banners, embroidered with fine titles: Philanthropist, Scholar, Man of Letters, Elder, Youth, Aesthete, Gentleman... Below, they wear all manner of cloaks, embroidered with fine patterns: Learning, Morality, National Tradition, the Will of the People, Logic, Justice, Eastern Civilization...
| + | あの者どもの頭上にはさまざまな旗幟があり、さまざまな美名が繍ってある——慈善家、学者、文士、長者、青年、雅人、君子……。頭の下にはさまざまな外套があり、さまざまな美しい模様が繍ってある——学問、道徳、国粋、民意、論理、公義、東方文明……。 |
| | | | |
| − | But he raised his javelin.
| + | しかし彼は投槍を挙げた。 |
| | | | |
| − | They all swore in unison that their hearts were in the center of their chests, unlike other biased humans. They all wore breast-mirrors to prove that they themselves firmly believed their hearts were in the center.
| + | 彼らは声を揃えて誓い、自分たちの心はみな胸の中央にあり、他の偏心な人類とは異なると説いた。彼らはみな胸の前に護心鏡を掲げて、自分でも心が胸の中央にあることを深く信じている証とした。 |
| | | | |
| − | But he raised his javelin.
| + | しかし彼は投槍を挙げた。 |
| | | | |
| − | He smiled, cast sideways — and struck them squarely in the heart.
| + | 彼はほほ笑み、やや身を傾けて一投したが、見事に彼らの心窩を射抜いた。 |
| | | | |
| − | All collapsed — but there was only a cloak, with nothing inside. The thing of Nothingness had escaped, victorious, for he was now a criminal who had slain philanthropists and their kind.
| + | 一切が頽然と倒れた——しかし、あったのは外套一枚のみで、その中には何もなかった。無物の物はすでに逃げ去り、勝利を得た。なぜなら彼はこの時、慈善家などを殺害した罪人となったからである。 |
| | | | |
| − | But he raised his javelin.
| + | しかし彼は投槍を挙げた。 |
| | | | |
| − | He strode through the ranks of Nothingness, seeing again the same nodding, the various banners, the various cloaks...
| + | 彼は無物の陣の中を大股に歩き、ふたたび一様の頷き、さまざまの旗幟、さまざまの外套が見えた……。 |
| | | | |
| − | But he raised his javelin.
| + | しかし彼は投槍を挙げた。 |
| | | | |
| − | In the end he grew old and died in the ranks of Nothingness. In the end he was no warrior, but the thing of Nothingness was the victor.
| + | 彼はついに無物の陣の中で老い衰え、寿命を終えた。彼はついに戦士ではなかったが、無物の物こそが勝者であった。 |
| | | | |
| − | In such circumstances, no one hears a battle cry: Peace.
| + | このような境地において、誰も戦いの叫びを聞かない——太平。 |
| | | | |
| − | Peace...
| + | 太平……。 |
| | | | |
| − | But he raised his javelin!
| + | しかし彼は投槍を挙げた! |
| | | | |
| − | December 14, 1925.
| + | 一九二五年十二月十四日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第21節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 21 === | + | 聪明人和傻子和奴才 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 聪明人和傻子和奴才
| |
| | | | |
| | 奴才总不过是寻人诉苦。只要这样,也只能这样。有一日,他遇到一个聪明人。 | | 奴才总不过是寻人诉苦。只要这样,也只能这样。有一日,他遇到一个聪明人。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 | | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 |
| − | | The Wise Man, the Fool, and the Slave
| |
| | | | |
| − | The slave did nothing but seek people to tell his troubles to. That was all he did, and all he could do. One day he met a wise man.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 聡明な人と馬鹿と奴隷 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir!" he said sorrowfully, tears streaming in a line from the corners of his eyes. "You know how it is. My life is simply not fit for a human being. I may not even get one meal a day, and that meal is nothing but sorghum husks — not even pigs and dogs will eat them — and even so, only a tiny bowl..."
| + | 奴隷はいつも人に苦しみを訴えるばかりであった。ただそうするだけ、またそうすることしかできなかった。ある日、彼は一人の聡明な人に出会った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "That is truly pitiable," the wise man said sympathetically.
| + | 「旦那様!」彼は悲しげに言い、涙が一筋の線となって目尻からまっすぐに流れ落ちた。「ご存知でしょう。私の暮らしはまったく人間の暮らしではありません。食事は一日一食あるかないか、その一食も高粱の皮で、豚や犬さえ食べないようなもので、しかもほんの小さな椀一杯きり……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Isn't it!" He brightened. "And the work knows no rest, day or night: carrying water at dawn, cooking in the evening, running errands in the morning, grinding flour at night, washing clothes in sunshine, holding umbrellas in rain, stoking the stove in winter, fanning in summer. At midnight I must simmer silver-ear fungus; waiting on the master when he wants money; never getting a share of the gambling winnings, and sometimes getting the whip besides..."
| + | 「それはまことに同情に堪えませぬ。」聡明な人も哀れげに言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Alas..." sighed the wise man, his eyes reddening as if about to weep.
| + | 「でしょう!」彼は嬉しくなった。「しかも仕事は昼夜休みなし。朝は水汲み、夜は飯炊き、午前は使い走り、夜は粉挽き、晴れの日は洗濯、雨の日は傘差し、冬は暖炉焚き、夏は扇ぎ。夜半には銀耳を煮込み、主人の金勘定に付き合い、小遣いなど一度ももらったことなく、おまけに鞭で打たれることまである……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir! I cannot go on like this. I must find another way. But what way?..."
| + | 「ああ、ああ……。」聡明な人は嘆息し、目の縁がいくぶん赤くなり、涙が出そうであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | "I think things will improve for you..."
| + | 「旦那様! こんな暮らしはもう続けられません。何か別の方法を考えなければ。でも、どんな方法が……?」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Really? I hope so. But just pouring out my troubles and receiving your sympathy and comfort has already made me feel much better. It shows that justice in heaven has not perished..."
| + | 「きっとそのうち良くなりますよ……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | But a few days later he grew discontented again and sought someone else to complain to.
| + | 「そうでしょうか? そうだといいのですが。でも旦那様に冤苦を訴え、ご同情と慰めをいただいて、ずいぶん楽になりました。やはり天の道理は滅んでいないのですね……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir!" he said, weeping. "You know how it is. Where I live is worse than a pigsty. The master doesn't treat me as a human being; he treats his lapdog ten thousand times better..."
| + | しかし数日もせぬうちに、彼はまた不平が募り、やはり人を訪ねて苦しみを訴えた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Outrageous!" the man shouted, startling the slave. This man was a fool.
| + | 「旦那様!」彼は涙を流して言った。「ご存知でしょう。私の住まいは豚小屋にも及びません。主人は私を人間扱いしない。飼い犬のほうを何万倍も大事にしている……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir, I live in nothing but a wretched little hut — damp, dark, full of bedbugs — lie down and they bite you to pieces. It reeks, and there's not a single window..."
| + | 「けしからん!」その人が大声で叫んだので、彼はぎくりとした。その人は馬鹿であった。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Can't you ask your master to make a window?"
| + | 「旦那様、私の住まいはたった一間の破れた小部屋で、湿って陰気で、南京虫だらけで、寝ると噛まれてたまりません。悪臭が鼻をつき、窓も一つもない……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "How could I?..."
| + | 「主人に窓を開けてくれと頼めばいいではないか!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Then take me to see it!"
| + | 「そんなことできませんよ……。」 |
| | | | |
| − | The fool went with the slave to his room and at once began smashing the mud wall.
| + | 「よし、案内しろ! 見に行こう!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir! What are you doing?" the slave cried in alarm.
| + | 馬鹿は奴隷について彼の小屋の外に来ると、いきなり泥壁を叩き壊し始めた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "I'm making you a window!"
| + | 「旦那様! 何をなさるのですか?」彼はひどく驚いて言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "You can't! The master will scold!"
| + | 「お前に窓を開けてやるのだ。」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Let him!" He went on smashing.
| + | 「だめです! 主人に叱られます!」 |
| | | | |
| − | "Help! A robber is destroying our house! Quick! He's about to break through!..." He wailed and screamed, rolling on the ground. A crowd of slaves came out and chased the fool away.
| + | 「知ったことか!」馬鹿はなおも壊し続けた。 |
| | | | |
| − | Hearing the commotion, the master came out last, slowly.
| + | 「人よ来てくれ! 強盗がうちの壁を壊しているぞ! 早く来てくれ! もう少しで穴が開いてしまう!……」彼は泣き叫びながら、地面をごろごろ転がった。奴隷たちが一斉に出てきて、馬鹿を追い払った。 |
| | | | |
| − | "A robber tried to destroy our house. I was the first to raise the alarm, and we all drove him away together," the slave said respectfully and triumphantly.
| + | 叫び声を聞いて、ゆっくりと最後に出てきたのが主人であった。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Well done," the master praised him.
| + | 「強盗がうちを壊そうとしたのを、私が真っ先に叫んで、みんなで追い払いました。」彼は恭しく、得意げに言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | That day many well-wishers came, the wise man among them.
| + | 「よくやった。」主人はこう褒めた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Sir. This time, thanks to my service, the master praised me. You said earlier that things would improve — you were truly far-sighted..."
| + | この日、大勢の見舞い客がやって来た。聡明な人もその中にいた。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Isn't that so..." the wise man replied, seeming to share his happiness.
| + | 「旦那様。今回は手柄がございまして、主人に褒められました。前におっしゃった、きっと良くなるというのは、まことに先見の明でございました……。」彼は大いに期待に満ちた様子で嬉しそうに言った。 |
| | | | |
| − | December 26, 1925.
| + | 「そうでしょう……。」聡明な人も共に喜ぶかのように答えた。 |
| − | |-
| + | |
| − | | === 第22節 ===
| + | 一九二五年十二月二十六日。 |
| − | | === Section 22 ===
| |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | 一觉 | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 一觉 |
| | | | |
| | 飞机负了掷下炸弹的使命,像学校的上课似的,每日上午在北京城上飞行。每听得机件搏击空气的声音,我常觉到一种轻微的紧张,宛然目睹了"死"的袭来,但同时也深切地感着"生"的存在。 | | 飞机负了掷下炸弹的使命,像学校的上课似的,每日上午在北京城上飞行。每听得机件搏击空气的声音,我常觉到一种轻微的紧张,宛然目睹了"死"的袭来,但同时也深切地感着"生"的存在。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二六年四月十日。 | | 一九二六年四月十日。 |
| − | | An Awakening
| |
| | | | |
| − | Airplanes, carrying their mission to drop bombs, flew over Beijing every morning as regularly as school classes. Whenever I heard the drone of engines striking the air, I felt a slight tension, as if watching "death" arrive, yet at the same time I felt deeply the presence of "life."
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 一覚 |
| | + | |
| | + | 飛行機が爆弾を投下する任務を負い、学校の授業のように毎日午前中に北京の空を飛んだ。機械が空気を打つ音を聞くたび、私はいつも一種のかすかな緊張を覚え、さながら「死」の襲来を目のあたりにしたかのようであったが、同時にまた「生」の存在を深く感じるのであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | After vaguely hearing one or two explosions, the airplane buzzed away and flew off slowly. Perhaps people had been killed or wounded, yet the world seemed even more peaceful. The tender leaves of the white poplars outside my window gleamed dark gold in the sunlight; the cherry-plum was blooming more splendidly than yesterday. I gathered up the newspapers scattered across the bed, brushed away the pale fine dust that had settled on my desk overnight — my small square study was again what is called "bright windows and clean desks."
| + | かすかに一、二の爆発音が聞こえた後、飛行機はぶうんと唸りながら、悠々と飛び去った。おそらく死傷者もあったろうが、天下はかえっていっそう太平に見えた。窓の外の白楊の若葉は日の光の中で烏金色に輝き、ゆすらうめ(榆叶梅)も昨日よりさらに爛漫と咲いていた。寝台に散乱した新聞を片付け、昨夜書卓に積もった蒼白い微塵を払うと、私の四角い小さな書斎も今日もまた、いわゆる「窓明るく机清し」であった。 |
| | | | |
| − | For some reason, I began editing the manuscripts of young writers that had long accumulated on my desk; I wanted to go through them all. As I read the works chronologically, the souls of these young people — who refused to put on rouge — stood one by one before me. They were graceful, sincere — ah, but then they suffered, groaned, grew angry, and at last coarse, my beloved youths!
| + | ある理由によって、私はかねてより手元に溜まっていた若い作家たちの原稿の校閲を始めた。すべてに片をつけるつもりであった。作品の年月順に読んでゆくと、化粧を施すことを肯んじないこれらの若者たちの魂が、次々と私の眼前に屹立した。彼らは優美で、純真であった。——ああ、しかし彼らは苦悩し、呻き、憤怒し、そしてついには粗暴になった。わが愛すべき若者たちよ! |
| | | | |
| − | Souls beaten coarse by wind and sand — because they are human souls, I love such souls; I would kiss this invisible, colorless, blood-drenched coarseness. In misty famous gardens, exotic flowers bloom, beautiful serene maidens stroll with transcendent nonchalance, a crane cries, and white clouds rise thickly... This naturally enchants, but I always remember that I live in the human world.
| + | 魂が風砂に打たれて粗暴になる。人の魂であるがゆえに、私はこのような魂を愛する。私は形なく色なき鮮血淋漓たる粗暴の上に接吻したいと思う。縹渺たる名園に奇花が咲き誇り、紅顔の静女が超然として逍遙し、鶴が一声嘶くと白雲が湧き立つ……。これは自然と人を惹きつけるものであろう。しかし私はいつも自分が人間の世に生きていることを忘れない。 |
| | | | |
| − | Weary, cigarette in hand, I closed my eyes in nameless thoughts and saw a very long dream. Suddenly I started awake; around me still hung the dusk; the smoke-curl rose in the still air like small summer clouds, slowly forming shapes that could not be named.
| + | 私は疲れ果て、紙巻煙草を指に挟み、名もなき思念の中で静かに目を閉じて、長い夢を見た。ふと目を覚ますと、身辺にはなおも薄暮の色が漂い、煙の篆(すじ)が動かぬ空気の中を昇っていた。幾片かの小さな夏の雲のように、ゆるやかに名づけがたい形象を幻出していた。 |
| | | | |
| − | April 10, 1926.
| + | 一九二六年四月十日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第23節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 23 === | + | 过客 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 过客
| |
| | | | |
| | 时:或一日的黄昏。 | | 时:或一日的黄昏。 |
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| | | | |
| | 一九二五年三月二日。 | | 一九二五年三月二日。 |
| − | | The Passerby
| |
| | | | |
| − | Time: The evening of some day.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | Place: Somewhere.
| + | 過客 |
| − | Characters: Old Man — about seventy, white beard and hair, long black robe.
| |
| − | Girl — about ten, dark hair, black eyes, white dress with black checks.
| |
| − | Passerby — about thirty to forty, weary yet stubborn, dark gaze, black beard, tangled hair, short black jacket and trousers both tattered, barefoot in broken shoes, a bag under his arm, leaning on a bamboo staff as tall as himself.
| |
| | | | |
| − | To the east, a few scrub trees and rubble; to the west, a desolate, crumbling graveyard; between them a trace that may or may not be a path. A small earthen hut has a door facing this trace; beside the door, a dead tree stump.
| + | 時——ある日の黄昏。 |
| | + | 所——ある場所。 |
| | + | 人物——老翁、七十歳ほど、白髪白鬚、黒の長袍。 |
| | + | 女の子、十歳ほど、紫がかった髪、黒い瞳、白地に黒の市松模様の長衫。 |
| | + | 過客、三四十歳ほど、疲憊しながら倔強な面持ち、陰鬱な目つき、黒い鬚、乱れ髪、黒い上衣と袴はともに破れ、裸足に破れた靴を履き、脇に袋を提げ、背丈ほどの竹の杖をついている。 |
| | | | |
| − | (The Girl is about to help the Old Man up from the stump.)
| + | 東には雑木が数本と瓦礫。西には荒涼として荒れ果てた叢葬地。その間に道とも道ならぬとも知れぬ一条の痕跡がある。小さな土の家がこの痕跡に向かって一つの戸を開けており、戸口の脇に一本の枯れた切り株がある。 |
| | | | |
| − | OLD MAN: Child. Hey, child! Why have you stopped?
| + | (女の子が切り株に座っている老翁を扶け起こそうとしている。) |
| − | GIRL (gazing east): Someone is coming. Let me look.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: No need to look. Help me inside. The sun is setting.
| |
| − | GIRL: I want to — look.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Oh, this child! Every day you see the sky, the earth, the wind — isn't that beautiful enough? Nothing is more beautiful. Yet you insist on watching someone. What appears at sunset will bring you no good... Let's go inside.
| |
| − | GIRL: But he's already near. Oh, a beggar.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: A beggar? I think not.
| |
| | | | |
| − | (The Passerby stumbles out from the scrub trees in the east, hesitates briefly, then slowly approaches the Old Man.)
| + | 翁——子供よ。おい、子供よ! どうして動かないのだ? |
| | + | 子——(東を望みながら)誰か来るわ。ちょっと見てみましょう。 |
| | + | 翁——見なくてよい。中へ入ろう。もう日が暮れる。 |
| | + | 子——あたし、——ちょっと見るわ。 |
| | + | 翁——やれやれ、お前という子は! 毎日空を見て、土を見て、風を見て、それでもまだ見足りないのか? 何だってこれらより見事なものはないのだ。お前はどうしても誰かを見たがる。日が沈む時に現れるものは、お前に何の善いこともしてくれはしないよ。……さあ中に入ろう。 |
| | + | 子——でも、もう近くまで来たわ。ああ、乞食だわ。 |
| | + | 翁——乞食? そうとは限るまい。 |
| | | | |
| − | PASSERBY: Good evening, sir.
| + | (過客が東の雑木の間からよろめき出て、しばしためらった後、ゆっくりと老翁のもとへ歩み寄る。) |
| − | OLD MAN: Ah, good evening! Thank you. And you?
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Sir, forgive my boldness — I would like to beg a glass of water. I am terribly thirsty from walking. There is neither pond nor puddle here.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Of course. Please sit down. (To the Girl) Child, bring water, and wash the cup clean.
| |
| | | | |
| − | (The Girl walks silently into the hut.)
| + | 客——お爺さん、今晩は。 |
| | + | 翁——ああ、今晩は! お元気で。お前さんも元気かね? |
| | + | 客——お爺さん、まことにぶしつけですが、一杯の水を恵んでいただきたいのです。歩き通しでひどく喉が渇きました。この辺りには池も水溜まりもないものですから。 |
| | + | 翁——うむ、よいよい。まあ座りなさい。(女の子に向かって)お前、水を持ってきておくれ。杯をきれいに洗ってな。 |
| | | | |
| − | OLD MAN: Please sit. What is your name?
| + | (女の子は黙って土の家の中に入ってゆく。) |
| − | PASSERBY: Name? — I don't know. As long as I can remember, I have always been alone. I don't know what I was originally called. Along the way people have called me various things, all different; I can't remember clearly, and I have never heard the same name twice.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: I see. Where have you come from?
| |
| − | PASSERBY (slightly hesitant): I don't know. As long as I can remember, I have been walking like this.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Right. Then may I ask where you are going?
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Of course. — But I don't know. As long as I can remember, I have been walking toward a place — up ahead. I only know I have walked many roads and now arrived here. I shall continue that way — (points west) — forward!
| |
| | | | |
| − | (The Girl carefully brings out a wooden cup and hands it over.)
| + | 翁——お客さん、まあ座りなさい。お名前はなんとおっしゃるかな。 |
| | + | 客——名前?——知りません。物心ついた頃から、たった一人でした。自分が元々何と呼ばれていたか知りません。歩いてゆく途中で、人々がその場かぎりの呼び方をしましたが、さまざまで、もう覚えていません。それに同じ呼び名を二度聞いたこともありません。 |
| | + | 翁——ほう。では、どちらからおいでになったかな? |
| | + | 客——(やや躊躇して)知りません。物心ついた頃から、こうして歩いているのです。 |
| | + | 翁——なるほど。では、どちらへおいでになるか聞いてもよいかな? |
| | + | 客——もちろんです。——しかし、知りません。物心ついた頃から、こうして歩いているのです。ある場所へ行かねばならない。その場所は前方にあります。ただ、ずいぶん長い道を歩いてきて、いまここに着いたことだけは覚えています。これからあちらへ——(西を指して)前へ進みます! |
| | | | |
| − | PASSERBY (takes the cup): Thank you, miss. (Drinks the water in two gulps, returns the cup.) Thank you, miss. Such kindness is truly rare. I don't know how to express my gratitude!
| + | (女の子が注意深く木杯を捧げ持って出てくる。差し出す。) |
| − | OLD MAN: Don't be so grateful. It does you no good.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: True, it does me no good. But I've recovered some strength. I must go on. Sir, you've lived here long — do you know what lies ahead?
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Ahead? Ahead are graves.
| |
| − | PASSERBY (astonished): Graves?
| |
| − | GIRL: No, no, no. There are so many wild lilies and wild roses there; I often go to play and look at them.
| |
| − | PASSERBY (looks west, seems to smile): True. Those places have many wild lilies and wild roses; I've often gone to see them too. But they are graves. (To the Old Man) Sir, what lies beyond the graveyard?
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Beyond? I don't know. I've never been.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: You don't know?!
| |
| − | GIRL: I don't know either.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: I only know the south, the north, the east — the way you came. That is the place I know best, and perhaps the best place for you. Don't blame me for speaking too much, but as tired as you are, wouldn't it be better to turn back? For you may not be able to reach the end going forward.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: May not reach the end?... (Ponders, suddenly starts.) That won't do! I must walk. Back there — every place has its labels, every place its landlord, every place its expulsion and its cages, every place its skin-deep smiles, every place its tears beyond the eyelids. I loathe it all; I will not turn back!
| |
| − | OLD MAN: That's not entirely true. You would also find tears from the heart, shed for your sorrow.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: No. I don't want to see their heartfelt tears; I don't want them to grieve for me!
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Then (shakes his head) you must walk on.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Yes, I must walk on. Besides, there is always a voice ahead urging me, calling me, giving me no rest. Only my feet have long been torn, wounded, bleeding... I won't drink anyone's blood. I drink only water to replenish my blood. There has always been water along the way. But my strength has grown too thin — too much water in the blood, perhaps. Today I haven't found even a puddle.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Perhaps. The sun has set; I think you might as well rest a while, as I do.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: But the voice ahead calls me on.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: I know.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: You know? You know that voice?
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Yes. It seems to have called me once too.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Was it the same voice that calls me now?
| |
| − | OLD MAN: I don't know. It called a few times; I ignored it, and it stopped, and I can barely remember.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Ah, ignored it... (Ponders, suddenly startles, listens.) No! I had better walk. I cannot rest. Only my feet are already torn. (Prepares to leave.)
| |
| − | GIRL: Take this! (Hands him a strip of cloth.) Bandage your wounds.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Thank you (takes it), miss. This is truly... extraordinary kindness. It will help me walk farther. (Sits on a broken brick, tries to wrap the cloth around his ankle.) But no! (Struggles to stand.) Miss, take it back. I can't wrap it. And such great kindness — I cannot repay it.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Don't be so grateful. It does you no good.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: True. But to me, this gift is the most precious thing.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Don't take it so seriously.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Yes. But I cannot. I'm afraid that if I accept a gift, I shall become like a vulture seeing a carcass — hovering nearby, wishing for her destruction so I can witness it; or cursing everything except her, including myself, for I would deserve the curse. But I haven't such strength; and even if I had, I wouldn't wish such a fate on her. I think this is safest. (To the Girl) Miss, this cloth is very fine, but a bit too small. Take it back.
| |
| − | GIRL (frightened, steps back): I don't want it! Take it with you!
| |
| − | PASSERBY (seems to smile): Oh... because I've touched it?
| |
| − | GIRL (nods, points to the bag): Put it in there. To play with.
| |
| − | PASSERBY (dejectedly steps back): But carrying this — how can I walk?...
| |
| − | OLD MAN: If you can't rest, you can't carry it either. — Rest a while, and it won't matter.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Right, rest... (Ponders, suddenly startles, listens.) No, I can't! I'd better walk.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: You really won't rest?
| |
| − | PASSERBY: I want to rest.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Then rest a while.
| |
| − | PASSERBY: But I can't...
| |
| − | OLD MAN: You still think walking is better?
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Yes. Walking is better.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Then you had better walk.
| |
| − | PASSERBY (stretches): Good, I take my leave. I am deeply grateful. (To the Girl) Miss, take this back, please.
| |
| | | | |
| − | (The Girl, frightened, pulls back her hands, about to flee into the hut.)
| + | 客——(杯を受け取り)ありがとう、お嬢さん。(水を二口で飲み干し、杯を返す。)ありがとう、お嬢さん。これは本当にめったにないご親切です。どうお礼を申し上げてよいか分かりません! |
| | + | 翁——そんなに感謝せんでよい。お前さんのためにならん。 |
| | + | 客——ええ、私のためにはなりません。しかし、おかげでいくぶん力が回復しました。さて、前に進みましょう。お爺さんは久しくこちらにお住まいのようですが、前方がどのような所かご存知ですか? |
| | + | 翁——前方? 前方は、墓だ。 |
| | + | 客——(驚いて)墓? |
| | + | 子——いいえ、いいえ、違うわ。あそこにはたくさんたくさんの野百合や野薔薇があるの。あたしはよく遊びに行って、眺めるのよ。 |
| | + | 客——(西を見やり、かすかに微笑むかのように)そうだ。あのあたりにはたくさんの野百合や野薔薇がある。私もよく遊びに行き、眺めたものだ。しかし、あれは墓だ。(老翁に向かって)お爺さん、あの墓地を過ぎた先はどうなっていますか? |
| | + | 翁——過ぎた先? それは分からんな。行ったことがないのでな。 |
| | + | 客——分からない?! |
| | + | 子——あたしも知らないわ。 |
| | + | 翁——私は南と北と東、つまりお前さんの来た方角だけを知っておる。あれが私の最もよく知る所であり、お前さんたちにとっても一番良い所かもしれん。お節介を怒らんでくれ。見たところ、お前さんはもうずいぶん疲れ切っておる。引き返したほうがよかろう。前に行っても歩き通せるかどうか分からんのだから。 |
| | + | 客——歩き通せるか分からない?……(沈思し、突然はっとして)それはいけない! 私は進むしかない。引き返せば、あそこにはどこにも名目があり、どこにも地主がおり、どこにも駆逐と牢獄があり、どこにも皮相の微笑があり、どこにも目の外の涙がある。私はそれらを憎む。引き返しはしない! |
| | + | 翁——そうでもあるまい。お前さんにも心の底の涙に出会うことがあろう。お前さんの悲しみのための。 |
| | + | 客——いいえ。彼らの心底の涙など見たくはない。彼らに私のために悲しんでほしくもない! |
| | + | 翁——ならば、お前さんは……(首を振って)進むしかないな。 |
| | + | 客——ええ、進むしかありません。それに、いつも前方に声がして、私を急き立て、呼びかけ、休ませてくれないのです。憎いことに足はとうに擦り切れ、傷だらけで血がたくさん流れた。……しかし私は誰の血だろうと飲みたくはない。水を飲んで血を補うだけです。道すがらいつも水はありましたから、特に不足を感じたことはなかった。ただ私の体力があまりに乏しいのは、血の中に水が多すぎるからでしょう。今日は小さな水溜まり一つにさえ出会わなかったのは、歩いた距離が少なかったせいでしょう。 |
| | + | 翁——それもどうかな。日も沈んだし、少し休んだほうがよかろう。わしのようにな。 |
| | + | 客——しかし、あの前方の声が私に歩けと言うのです。 |
| | + | 翁——分かっておる。 |
| | + | 客——分かっておいでですか? あの声をご存知なのですか? |
| | + | 翁——ああ。あの声はかつて、わしも呼んだことがあるらしい。 |
| | + | 客——では、今私を呼んでいるのと同じ声ですか? |
| | + | 翁——それは分からん。何度か呼んだが、わしが構わずにおると、やがて呼ばなくなり、もうはっきり覚えておらんのだ。 |
| | + | 客——ああ、構わずにおくとは……。(沈思し、突然ぎくりとして耳を澄ます。)いけない! やはり歩いたほうがよい。休んではおれぬ。憎いことに足はとうに擦り切れたのだが。(歩き出す支度をする。) |
| | + | 子——これをどうぞ!(布切れを差し出す。)傷を包んで行って。 |
| | + | 客——ありがとう、(受け取って)お嬢さん。これは本当に……。本当にめったにないご親切だ。これでもっと遠くまで歩けるだろう。(崩れた煉瓦に座り、布を踝に巻こうとする。)しかし、いけない!(力を込めて立ち上がる。)お嬢さん、お返しします。やはり巻けないのです。それに、あまりに深いご親切は、お礼のしようがありません。 |
| | + | 翁——そんなに感謝せんでよい。お前さんのためにならん。 |
| | + | 客——ええ、私のためにはなりません。しかし私にとって、この施しは最上のものです。 |
| | + | 翁——本気にするでない。 |
| | + | 客——ええ。しかし受け取れないのです。もし誰かの施しを得たら、私はきっとこうなるでしょう。禿鷲が死骸を見つけたように、その人のそばを徘徊し、その人の滅亡を祈り、自ら見届けようとする。さもなければその人以外の一切が滅びるよう、自分自身もろとも呪うでしょう。なぜなら私は呪いを受けるに値する者だからです。しかし私にはまだそのような力がない。たとえあったとしても、彼女がそのような境遇になることを望みはしない。彼女たちはおそらくそのような境遇を望んでいないのだから。これが最も穏当だと思います。(女の子に向かって)お嬢さん、この布切れはとても良いものだが、少し小さすぎます。お返しします。 |
| | + | 子——(恐れて後ずさる。)要りません! 持って行って! |
| | + | 客——(微笑するかのように)ああ……。私が触ったから? |
| | + | 子——(頷き、袋を指差して)そこに入れて、遊んでいいわ。 |
| | + | 客——(力なく後ずさる。)しかしこれを背負っては、どうやって歩くのか……。 |
| | + | 翁——休めぬのなら、背負うこともできまい。——少し休めば、何でもなくなる。 |
| | + | 客——そうだ、休息……。(物思いにふけるが、突然はっとして耳を澄ます。)いや、だめだ! やはり歩こう。 |
| | + | 翁——どうしても休みたくないのかね? |
| | + | 客——休みたいのです。 |
| | + | 翁——ならば少し休んだらよかろう。 |
| | + | 客——しかし、休めないのです……。 |
| | + | 翁——やはり歩いたほうがよいと思うかね? |
| | + | 客——ええ。やはり歩いたほうがよい。 |
| | + | 翁——ならば、歩くがよかろう。 |
| | + | 客——(腰を伸ばして)では、お別れです。まことにありがとうございました。(女の子に向かって)お嬢さん、これをお返しします。どうぞお収めください。 |
| | | | |
| − | OLD MAN: Take it with you. If it's too heavy, you can drop it in the graveyard anytime.
| + | (女の子は恐れ、手を引っ込めて土の家の中に逃げ込もうとする。) |
| − | GIRL (steps forward): Oh no, that won't do!
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Oh no, that won't do.
| |
| − | OLD MAN: Then hang it on the wild lilies and wild roses.
| |
| − | GIRL (claps): Ha ha! Good!
| |
| − | PASSERBY: Oh...
| |
| | | | |
| − | (Briefest silence.)
| + | 翁——持って行きなさい。もし重すぎたら、いつでも墓地の中に捨てればよい。 |
| | + | 子——(前に出て)ああ、それはだめ! |
| | + | 客——ああ、それはだめだ。 |
| | + | 翁——ならば、野百合や野薔薇の上に掛けておけばよい。 |
| | + | 子——(手を叩いて)ははは! いいわね! |
| | + | 客——ああ……。 |
| | | | |
| − | OLD MAN: Then farewell. Peace be with you. (Stands, to the Girl) Child, help me inside. Look, the sun has long set. (Turns to the door.)
| + | (きわめて短い間の、沈黙。) |
| − | PASSERBY: Thank you. Peace be with you. (Paces, ponders, suddenly starts.) But I cannot! I must walk. I had better walk... (Immediately lifts his head and strides resolutely westward.)
| |
| | | | |
| − | (The Girl helps the Old Man into the hut, then closes the door. The Passerby stumbles into the wilderness, and the night follows behind him.)
| + | 翁——では、さらばだ。ご無事を祈る。(立ち上がり、女の子に向かって)子供よ、中へ扶けておくれ。ごらん、もうとっくに日が沈んでしまった。(振り返り戸口に向かう。) |
| | + | 客——ありがとうございました。ご無事をお祈りします。(佇み、沈思し、突然はっとして)しかし、私は休めない! 進むほかはない。やはり歩こう……。(たちまち頭を上げ、奮然として西に向かって歩み去る。) |
| | | | |
| − | March 2, 1925.
| + | (女の子が老人を扶けて土の家に入り、すぐに戸を閉める。過客は荒野の中へよろめきながら踏み込んでゆく。夜の闇が彼の後を追ってくる。) |
| | + | |
| | + | 一九二五年三月二日。 |
| | |- | | |- |
| − | | === 第24節 === | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| − | | === Section 24 === | + | 死后 |
| − | |-
| |
| − | | 死后
| |
| | | | |
| | 我梦见自己死在道路上。 | | 我梦见自己死在道路上。 |
| Line 1,570: |
Line 832: |
| | | | |
| | 一九二五年七月十二日。 | | 一九二五年七月十二日。 |
| − | | After Death
| |
| | | | |
| − | I dreamed that I had died on the road.
| + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 15px;" | |
| | + | 死後 |
| | | | |
| − | Where this was, how I had got there, how I had died — none of this was clear to me. In short: by the time I realized I was already dead, I was already dead there.
| + | 私は夢の中で自分が路上で死んでいた。 |
| | | | |
| − | I heard a few magpies cawing, then a flock of crows. The air was fresh — though with a touch of earthiness — it must have been about dawn. I tried to open my eyes, but they would not move in the slightest, as though they were not my eyes; then I tried to raise my hand — the same.
| + | ここはどこなのか、どうしてここに来たのか、どうして死んだのか、そうしたことは何も分からなかった。とにかく、自分がすでに死んでいると自覚した時には、もうそこに死んでいたのだ。 |
| | | | |
| − | A terrible arrowhead of dread suddenly pierced my heart. In my lifetime I had once jokingly supposed: if a person's death meant only the destruction of the motor nerves while consciousness remained, that would be more terrible than complete death. My supposition had come true — I myself was its proof.
| + | 数声の喜鵲(かささぎ)の鳴き声が聞こえ、続いて烏の一群が鳴いた。空気はさわやかだった——多少の土の匂いはしたが——おそらく夜明け頃であろう。目を開けようとしたが、少しも動かず、まるで自分の目ではないかのようだった。手を上げようとしたが、やはり同じであった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Footsteps — someone passing. A wheelbarrow was pushed past my head, probably heavily laden, squealing irritatingly. Everything looked rosy red — the sun must have risen. So my face was pointing east. But that was of no consequence. Muttering — onlookers.
| + | 恐怖の鋭い矢先がたちまち私の心を貫いた。生きていた時、私はかつて冗談半分に想像したことがあった。もし人の死が運動神経の廃滅にすぎず、知覚がなお残っているとすれば、それは完全な死よりも恐ろしいことだと。私の予想は果たして的中した。自分自身がこの予想を証明しているのだ。 |
| | | | |
| − | More footsteps, one after another, stopping nearby, and more whispering: the crowd was growing. Suddenly I very much wanted to hear their comments. But at the same time I thought: what I had said in life about criticism being worthless was probably said against my own convictions — barely dead and already exposed. Still I listened; but no conclusion emerged, it came down only to this:
| + | 足音が聞こえた。通行人だろう。一台の独輪車が私の頭のそばを押されてゆき、おそらく重い荷を積んでいるのだろう、軋軋と耳障りな、歯がむずがゆくなるような音を立てた。目の前がぼんやり緋色に感じられた。太陽が昇ったに違いない。すると私の顔は東を向いていることになる。しかしそんなことはどうでもよい。ぺちゃくちゃと人の声がした。見物人だ。 |
| | | | |
| − | "Dead?..."
| + | ぞろぞろと足音が続き、近くまで来ると止まった。低い囁き声もいっそう多くなった。見物人が増えてきたのだ。ふと私は彼らの議論を聞きたくなった。しかし同時に思った。生きていた頃に批評は気にするに値しないと言っていたのは、おそらく本心ではなかったのだろう。死んだばかりでもう馬脚を現してしまった。だがやはり聞き入った。しかし結局何の結論も得られず、まとめてみればこんな具合であった—— |
| − | "Hmm. — Well..."
| |
| − | "Hmph!..."
| |
| − | "Tsk... Alas!..."
| |
| | | | |
| − | I was very glad, for I had not heard a single familiar voice. Otherwise I might have caused them grief; or given them satisfaction; or furnished them with after-dinner gossip. All of which would have embarrassed me. Now no one could see me, so no one was affected. Good — I had wronged no one!
| + | 「死んだのか?……」 |
| | + | 「うむ。——これは……」 |
| | + | 「ふん!……」 |
| | + | 「ちぇ。……ああ!……」 |
| | | | |
| − | But an ant, probably, was crawling up my back, itching. I could not move at all. On the back of my hand I felt the pattern of a rush mat — the shroud was not bad. Only I didn't know who had paid for it — a pity! But damn those undertakers! A corner of my shirt was creased at the back, and they hadn't smoothed it.
| + | 私はこの上なく喜んだ。なぜなら一つも知り合いの声を聞かなかったからだ。さもなくば、彼らを悲しませるか、あるいは彼らを喜ばせるか、あるいは食後の閑談の種を増やすことになったろう。そのいずれも私には申し訳なく思われる。今は誰にも見えぬのだから、誰にも影響を及ぼさない。よかった、これでようやく人に顔向けができるというものだ! |
| | | | |
| − | A sudden gust of wind, something covered me from above, and they all flew off, saying as they left: "What a pity!..."
| + | しかし、おそらく蟻が一匹、背中を這っていた。痒い。だが少しも動けず、もはやそれを払いのける力もなかった。手の甲に草蓆の筋目が触れ、この経帷子もまあ悪くないと思った。ただ誰が金を出してくれたのか分からないのが惜しい。しかし、けしからんのは、小僧どもめ! 背中の襦袢の裾が皺になっているのに、直してもくれない。 |
| | | | |
| − | I nearly fainted with rage.
| + | 不意に一陣の風、一片の何かが上から被さってきて、人々は一斉に飛び散り、去り際にまだ言っていた——「惜しいことだ!……」 |
| | | | |
| − | I immediately closed my eyes, out of disgust. After a while it was quiet — he had probably gone. But another ant seemed to be crawling up my neck, finally reaching my face, circling around the eye socket.
| + | 私は怒りのあまり卒倒しそうになった。 |
| | | | |
| − | Who would have thought that a person's thoughts still change after death! Suddenly a force shattered the peace of my heart; at the same time many dreams unfolded before my eyes. A few friends wished me happiness, a few enemies wished me destruction. But I always went on living, neither happy nor destroyed, neither up nor down, failing to meet either side's expectations. And now I had died like a shadow, without even my enemies knowing — I wouldn't grant them even a shred of effortless joy... I felt I wanted to cry with satisfaction. This was probably my first weeping after death.
| + | すぐに目を閉じた。その者が煩わしくてたまらなかったからだ。しばらく静かになり、おそらく行ってしまったのだろう。しかしまた一匹の蟻が首のあたりを這い始め、ついには顔まで来て、目の縁をぐるぐると回っていた。 |
| | | | |
| − | Yet in the end no tears fell; I only saw something like a spark flash before my eyes — and sat up.
| + | まさか死んだ後にも人の思いが変化するとは思いもよらなかった。ふいに一つの力が私の心の平安を突き破った。同時に多くの夢が目の前に現れた。何人かの友人が私に安楽を祝い、何人かの仇敵が私に滅亡を祝った。しかし私はいつも安楽にもならず、滅亡もせず、中途半端に生き続けてきた。どちらの期待にも応えられなかった。今また影のように死んでしまったが、仇敵にさえ知らせず、費用のかからぬ喜びさえ贈ってやらない。……私は快意のあまり泣き出しそうになった。これはおそらく死後初めての涙であった。 |
| | | | |
| − | July 12, 1925.
| + | しかしついに涙は一滴も流れなかった。ただ目の前にちらりと火花が閃いたかと思うと、私は起き上がっていた。 |
| | + | |
| | + | 一九二五年七月十二日。 |
| | |} | | |} |
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| − | [[Category:Lu Xun]] | + | [[Category:Lu Xun]][[Category:Chinese-Japanese Bilingual]] |
| − | [[Category:Japanese Translations]] | |
| − | [[Category:Bilingual Editions]]
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